Tuesday, January 25, 2011

It is not as bad as it seems.

When we are confronted with a problem, we often feel very worried especially when we do not have a solution. Our mind play tricks on us and our stomach is full of butterflies. Our hands gets cold and we sweat a little. This is more so if we have to explain in front of your bosses or in an interview. We always feel that the problem is bigger than it used to be. There is so much fear and our internal demons will take this chance to intensify the fear.

How do we manage our emotions in this case ? I have a colleague who would prepare his answers in a written form but before that he would think of all the possible questions which could be raised at the meeting.  He would spend the whole nite thinking and preparing the text. He became an expert in anticipation. If an question is raise during a meeting or presentation, he would look for the question and read out the answers. So, just imagine the amount of work and reports which he has to prepare before an event. Some times, there is no questions and his preparation will come to a null. It can be very wasteful and strenous in such exercise.  Some people said that " we do not plan to fail but fail to plan ". This philosophy is good but can result in doing too much over nothing. But, having said that, very few people can stand on their feet and think.  A prepared text will have a calming and soothing effect.

Rightly, we should know our subject well and train ourself in the basics of presentation. There are many techniques to calm ourself down and we should try to master some of them. Deep and slow breathing is one of the way , control your mind not to focus on the subject matter, some light exercise , rehearsal and have lots of confidence. The level of confidence can be improved through training and actual experiences. When I was young professional , I often sweat when I have to face my board members but now, I love to talk and present my subject slowly and surely.  I have fumbled alot but in the process I grow.

People said " success breeds  success" but I believe failure is the mother of success. Each time , we fall down , we should pick ourself up and clean up and walk with our chin high. Failure is nothing but a process for us to learn and gets stronger.  Nothing to be shameful. We are just not well prepared that is all. For each attempt, we should fall less and less and finally, we can do it with perfection. The sweetness of success comes from failures. After we fail, we will get know the sweetness of success.

When our child is young, they will learn to walk and in the process, these children will fall and sometimes, very hard but it is nature's way or in their instinct to pick themselves up and walk again. Don't be afraid to let them fall , otherwise, they cannot walk. In one of my previous article, I mentioned about the birth process of a cocoon.

There was a scientist who watch the birth of a cocoon. The cocoon have to squeeze itself through a tiny channel  before coming out as a beautiful butterfly. The scientist blamed Nature for causing so much pain and he decided to open up the tiny channel to let the cocoon to come through faster.  Yes, the cocoon came out faster but it cannot fly.  The tiny channel which the cocoon have to squeeze through is to let the fluid in the wings of the cocoon to squeeze out and also to straighten the joints and soft bones of the cocoon , so that when it came out as a butterfly, the wings are strong enough. So, don't be afraid of failures.

If you are not fearful of failures and you know your subject well and you keep to the belief that it is not as bad as it seems by controlling your mind. You will come out with flying colors like the beautiful butterfly. Flying in style and grace. Believe me, you have to believe in yourself before others can believe you.

Namaste.

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