Saturday, November 28, 2015

The irony of life

The irony of life

When I read Steve Jobs last works about having wealth but stricken with cancer and yet money cannot get a solution for him to replace his sufferings and pain, I have actually seen a lot of such irony happening to people close to me.

Yes, my sister in law is in the same situation as what is happening to Steve. Her husband spend a lot of money to try to cure her but her conditions deteriorated by the day.  The Cancer have been eating away her health and she gets thinner everyday.

Her recent operation to remove the cancerous growth failed and I think she has withdrawn into a denial mode. She seems to be upset with all thing happening to her and refuse to speak or response. Yes, I think it is time for her family members to tell her to let go and must not give her too much hope.

Letting go is very difficult as the attachment of the family have been too long and the family bond is still strong. The happening is too sudden and my sister in law is too young to die. But. It has to be done . She has to pass on peacefully and closed all the chapters with the family and friends. Let her soul rest in peace. Everyone have to come to terms with life.

I have advise my niece to read up the book called " Chasing daylight ". It is about a top executive in a big 4 accounting firm coming in term with cancer at an early stage and prepare himself to face death and passes on. It was done in a very logical and professional way.

We hope the best for my sister in law but she needs to know the reality of life . Someone have to do the job and it is better to be fast.


Thursday, November 26, 2015

Greed, the reason for restlessness

Is my mind contented with what I have ? Contentment bring happiness and a calm mind. Can we fulfill all our cravings so that we can be contented ? No, our cravings are always revolving and disturbin gour mind.

When we have a little, we want more and after getting a sligthly more, we want more and finally , we want it all. This is the human character. How do we contain our unfulfilled cravings or greed ? When we have a land, we want to build a house, when we have a house, we want a bungalow and when we have a bungalow , we want a palace. Bigger and bigger.  High and the highest,  wide and the widest and more until all. Yes, look at ourselve in the mirror and we can see our cravings if you notice or focus. 

When we get old, we touch up with powers , comestics and whatever we can find to make us younger and more attractive.  This is also part of cravings. So, greek is not about money or quantity only but there are many aspects of greed and some are more stutle.

How do we contained our cravings ? Yes, we control the mind and the heart. Sometimes , we blame our for the greed and we use the phase " greek of the heart ". But the heart is not a thinking and and there is no activities except to move the heart or pump the heart. Often we make our heart to feel and if we have more, we feel good. The stirring force is the mind.  The thinking machine which influenced the deal and teh attachment.

So if we want to make ourself contented, we work on our mind and calm it down or cut it down in zize. The smaller the image, the weaker the greed or discontentment. Cut down the wild thoughts going through our head and make it smaller so that more can be accept.

The mind linked to the heart and the body. Control the mind and you will control the body and heart. You cannot control the heart and body for the mind. It is only one way.from the mind down.


Tuesday, November 24, 2015

Wild imaginations

Wild imaginations 

Our imaginations depends on our mind whether it is tame or running wild or whether it is in an active or passive stage. Out mind keep evolving and thoughts will go through our heads in seconds. 

Some studies showed that there is about 50,000 thoughts going through our mind. In and out . Just imagine you switch on and off on your electric switch , it will blow your switch or the light bulbs linking to the switch. For your mind , it will get tired and it also drain the energy from the body. You will look tired , exhausted and drained . What kind of life ? Boring, passive and destructive.

So, we know our problem and we have to fix it . It is a simple solution, just reduce the number of thoughts going through our mind . By so doing , we will regain the freshness and our energy and our life.  It is as simple as that .

We have to train our mind every available moments and focus on the present and take away the thoughts in our mind. How to focus on the moment . Tell your mind the past is gone and the future is yet to come and what we have is the present moment.
If we focus, our thoughts will be less and less. It is not easy but teach our mind to also focus on our breath if we have nothing to focus on. This will train our mind to be obedient .

It is nothing difficult and we have to pace ourself at the beginning and it will get better and better.

If you are in a place at home or at work , find a quiet corner to do the exercise . Once a while , do it in an open field and we can enjoy the good chi or energy from nature.

Go and try it. 


Sunday, November 22, 2015

Face of death

Face of death

I have seen the face of death a few times before. The pain , the frailness and the hope all mixed in the face. It is an image of confusion. It really awakes my awareness of death.

We cannot avoid death. The rich, the famous and the powerful have gone in the same way without exceptions. Nobody can buy time . Not the saintly, the evil and the commoner. Each one have to go at a specific time. A designated departure.

I was looking at my dying SIL with cancer. The look has deteriorated so much after a few weeks as the Cancer eat away the health of the body. Two weeks ago she could open her eyes and talk but yesterday , she could not open her eyes and talking took so much effort from her. She is a total wreck and is only the skin covering the bones on certain part of the bodies. The disease have been aggressive . So many  similar memories surged across my mind . It strikes the core of fear in me as the patient struggle to herself alive.

Tomorrow, she is going for an operation to remove part of the Cancer cell which could give her some hope to fight back despite all the risk . It is a bold step and instead of hoping , it is better to take a chance. Sometimes, ago I told the story of two mouse. Each one of them ran into a hole chased by a cat. One waited and took the chance to run out and survive as the cat dozed off while another mouse stayed behind and die of hunger. So, doing the same thing and expecting a different result is madness  as I said before in my previous article.

We will be praying for her and whatever result, it is destiny.


Friday, November 20, 2015

Feeling grateful

To be alive , each day is a blessing and we should feel grateful.  Grateful for the additional one day of life.  Most of the time, we take it for granted and do not treasure the day as we have the years.

I always remind myself , life is uncertain as a slight twist of an event could change our life forever. We don't have to wait for that moment to happen and we can live as if today is our last day on earth.  Isn't this thinking correct ? Why are we waiting for another day to live the life we choose.  Madness isn't it ?

There is another saying " when fear ends, that is when life begins". Again , this is very true. We are restrict by fear . The fear of dying, the fear of our boss, the fear of not having enough for retirement and the list goes on and on forever. It is so funny that we stop doing risky things and stop spending our money even if we have enough . The fear is imaginery.

Like steve jobs say " when we have gather enough wealth to live our life , we should turn to the things that we want to do or to live out our passions " But, how to define " enough " .  Living a simple life  or an expensive life demands different amount.  So , I don't quite agreed that we should do the things we like or live out our passions after we accummulate enough wealth. As I say " when is it enough/" . I would like to think that enough wealth is not the criteria but rather living happily all the time and doing the things we like is most important irrespective of money.  We must find the time to do it.

Time waits for no one as the days rushes by. Why wait until we cannot walk before we go traveling ? Why wait for us to have enough money to eat the foods we like ?  We have to do whatever we want as soon as possible if not today for tomorrow will never come,.

I have seen people who is reluntant to eat when they are young as they want to accummulate their wealth and when they have accummulated enough , they cannot eat because they have gone old. Does this equation hold waters ?  Supid and silly and bad judgement.  But , this the normal thinking of billions before me and after me.  This is the establishment.


Thursday, November 19, 2015

Body massage

There are so many forms of massage  ie Thai, Indian, Bali , Chinese ,  Japanese, etc.  Is massage good for our body ? Does it has any health impact or just a leisure.  Recently, I have been indulging in the back massage and I feel good after a good rub or massage .  Some massage have this aromatic smell which makes your body and mind relax as the massaging process is on going.

For those doing the desk job or under stress, a good massage will enhance the blood circulation.  Just imagine sitting on your butt for 8 to 10 hours with minimum movement, the butt is not only sore but is compressed against the seat and with a good massage , it will get the nerves and the blood circulation moving.

Under stress, the stress goes into the joints and body parts and it gets stored in the muscles or the nerves and this gives aches and pain if this stress persist for a long period of time. The rub and stretching will release the stress and we feel better. This is what I feel when the massage is over.

For those people who go for foot massage, it is to excite the respective large organs in our body as it is believed that the nerve ends to these vital organs ends in the base of our foot.  In order, to motivate or activate them, the pressure to these nerve endings will send massage to this vital organs and massaging them is like massaging the vital organs. By exciting or massaging these organs, it will make it healthy and well.

A more relax body will bring a more relax and healthy mind and this is a strong connection between the two. A healthy mind brings a healthy body and a healthy body supports a healthy mind. If you have a tense up and hard body, it will only bring pain and discomfort which will affect the peace of the mind.


extracts :

8 full-body benefits for getting your regular massages- besides feeling great

YOU LOOK FORWARD TO YOUR REGULAR MASSAGE. Maybe it relaxes you. Maybe it energizes you. Maybe it helps relieve the tension in your back. Whatever it is, you know you like it. But massage has more benefits than you probably realize.
"Regular massage keeps the body working at optimal levels," says C.G. Funk, VP of industry relations and product development for Massage Envy. "It keeps people well-physically and emotionally."

Here are eight interesting benefits of massagefor your body.
1. Fighting Fibromyalgia Symptoms Fibromyalgia is a chronic condition characterized by muscle pain, fatigue and tenderness, according to the American College of Rheumatology. Symptoms can be brought on or exacerbated by stress and lack of sleep. Frequent Fibromyalgia massages have been found to help relieve stress as well as alleviate muscle pain, discomfort and spasms in patients suffering from fibromyalgia. In fact, it's one of the most effective complementary treatments, according to the National Fibromyalgia Association, which reports that about 40 percent of sufferers have used it as part of their treatment plan.

2. Easing Surgical Effects Postsurgical rehabilitation is one of the most important aspects of undergoing any procedure. And massage can help get you back on your feet by increasing circulation, relaxing muscles, and improving joint movement and flexibility. It's even been found to promote tissue regeneration and reduce postsurgical adhesions and swelling, according to the Associated Bodywork and Massage Professionals.

3. Improving Mood It's no secret that massage can relax you and make you feel good mentally. But did you know that it may even help treat anxiety and depression? According to a review by the Touch Research Institute at the University of Miami School of Medicine, massage is able to lower the body's level of cortisol, a stress hormone, by as much as 53 percent. Massage also appears to increase the feel-good hormones serotonin and dopamine.

4. Headache Relief Approximately 28 million Americans suffer from migraine headaches, according to the National Headache Foundation. Often, migraines are triggered or exacerbated by stress and poor sleep. In a study published in the Annals of Behavioral Medicine, researchers found that participants who received massages had better quality sleep and fewer migraines than participants who didn't. Effects even lasted up to three weeks after therapy ended. Massage therapy can help relieve headaches if you suffer from them.

5. Lowering Blood Pressure About 72 million Americans have high blood pressure, which can lead to stroke and heart attack. A study in the journal Biological Research for Nursing found that people who had at least three 10-minute back massages a week lowered their blood pressure more than people who spent the same amount of time just relaxing.

6. Increasing Flexibility Whether you're an avid athlete who is constantly putting stress on your knees or a middle-aged adult who has lost some range of motion in your hips, staying flexible is key. Massage can help you maintain flexibility and range of motion by working the muscles, connective tissue, tendons and ligaments, and by stimulating the production and retention of the natural lubricants between the connective tissue fibers.

7. Breaking Back Pain While back pain is one of the most common reasons people seek massage, many are not aware of just how helpful a treatment it is. In fact, a study in theAnnals of Internal Medicine found that massage therapy was more effective at relieving back pain than other therapies such as acupuncture and spinal modification. It even appeared to reduce the use of painkillers by 36 percent.

8. Curbing Carpal Tunnel Carpal tunnel is a painful condition in which the median nerve that connects the forearm and hand becomes pinched at the wrist, according to the National Institute of Neurological Disorders and Stroke. Symptoms include burning, tingling or numbness in the palm, thumb and middle fingers. It can also lead to difficulty forming a fist or gripping small objects. Treatments usually consist of medication, wrist braces and surgery. But a study in the Journal of Bodywork and Movement reported that carpal tunnel patients receiving regular massage had less pain, reduced symptoms and improved grip strength.

Tuesday, November 17, 2015


Lately, I could find myself wondering how to sleep early.  I will be on my bed at 9.30pm and I could suddenly dozed off but I wake up again after slightly pass 12 midnight.  Then I will struggle to make myself sleep.  The harder I try , the more elusive is my sleep. How can I have a good sleep so that I could wake up early morning and be fresh for work.

I find that if I quiet down my mind and bring my mind to the alpha level, I could sleep again and to quiet down my mind, I turned to mediation.  How do you do in meditation ?

There are many forms of meditation and one of the technique is to concentrate on your breath. If I have an objective to sleep by practicing meditation , then it is not truly meditation. In meditation, there can not be a motive but it is purely meditation in the present and let our mind still and letting our body go and relax.

We have to care for our body and not to assert it or force it to quiet down.  It has to be in a natural stage and let our mind drfit and quiet down by itself. We cannot push, rush it or force it .  It has to drift and find its own level at its own time. It is just the ripple on the water, it needs its own time to quiet down and to be still.

If we continued to hold on to the mind like our hands holding the water, it will never be still unless you put the glass of water on to the table . let go of it and  let it settles down by itself.

In a proper meditation , it should not be a focus to achieve something and it should be free of any motive and agenda. After finding the level, our sleep will automatically come and we can dooze off for the rest of the night easily.

If you quiet down your mind to a certain level, it will induced sleep without any effort.