Tuesday, April 15, 2014

There is something we should not be doing

1. You spend too much time doing things you shouldn’t be doing.

Video games. Reality TV. Surfing the ‘net. Stuffing your face with too much food. Drinking too much. And the list goes on. Take a serious look at your life. Where are you spending the majority of your time? And does it serve you well? Is it leading to a better life? Is it laying the foundation for a bright future? If not, then you need to reevaluate your routine activities and make changes.

2. You find yourself complaining a lot.

I know people who are constantly overwhelmed with life, and they never cease to tell me. Are you one of those people? Do you complain about your job, your boss, your salary, your neighbors or your spouse? If you do, then you are doing nothing but exuding negative energy. Negativity doesn’t change things. It keeps you stuck. So change your thoughts and talk about what you appreciate about your life, not what you don’t like.

3. You don’t feed your mind.

If you’re not continually growing and learning as a person, then you are stagnant – just like a still pond that doesn’t move and grows green gunk on it. That’s what your mind does if you don’t keep it active and learn new things. Positive challenges in your life will expand your mind, not send it backwards.

4. You have a lot of negative self-talk.

Self-talk can make or break your life. As Henry Ford said, “Whether you think you can, or think you can’t… either way, you’re right.” If you tell yourself that you’re not smart enough to get that promotion or start a business, then you’re right. If you tell yourself you’re too exhausted to put effort into changing your life, then you’re right. Whatever you tell yourself becomes your reality. So closely monitor what you say to yourself, because you will find that your life matches your thoughts.

5. You feel uninspired.

Do you have a passion for anything? I know a lot of people who think they don’t have a passion. But that’s never the case. There has to be something that you enjoy doing. So you need to rediscover what excites you, and then do more of it.

6. You don’t plan for your future.

While it’s always great to live in the “now” and “be in the moment,” sometimes you need to look ahead to see where you want to go. If you don’t have a goal or a plan, then you are like a boat that is wandering aimlessly in the ocean hoping to end up somewhere good. But you can’t do that. You have to make a step-by-step guide to get where you want to go. Just like a GPS gets you to a destination, you need your own inner GPS to guide you.

7. You spend too much time with people who don’t contribute to your growth.

It’s easy to get stuck hanging out with people who are not making you feel like a better person. But if you keep doing that, then you will stay stagnant or get pulled down with them. I like to call them “Energy Vampires.” They suck the life out of you and give you nothing positive in return. Instead, go find growth-oriented people to be around.

8. You’re addicted to your phone.

Sure, cell phones are super cool gadgets that can leave us entranced when we use them. While that’s fun, think about all the time you are wasting with your phone. Even worse, think about all the relationships that might be affected. Maybe you’re texting or searching the internet while you’re having dinner with your spouse or kids. If you are, you’re missing out on meaningful time you can spend with your loved ones – or time you could devote to making a plan for your future.

9. You spend money on things that don’t matter.

There is a difference between a “need” and a “want.” I’m sure we all learned that in kindergarten. However, in today’s society, we have blurred the lines quite a bit (see #8… the cell phone). In fact, I know people who can’t pay their mortgage, but still have the fanciest gadgets on the planet. If you stop to think about it, there is very little that we actually need. Food, water, shelter and love are some of those things. All the rest are just bonuses. So look at what you’re spending your money on and see if you can make adjustments. Maybe you can use the money you save to invest in your future.

10. You don’t get enough sleep.

I’m not a medical doctor, but I have read enough books to know how vitally important sleep is. I could write 20 pages on it. But I obviously don’t have enough room in this short article. Sleep is crucial for good health. If you’re too busy to get enough sleep or if you simply have a bad habit of staying up until the wee hours of the morning, you should re-evaluate your habits.

11. You’re not taking care of your body.

Not only is sleep essential to your health, so is food and exercise. I know I’m not telling you anything you don’t already know. But eating a balanced, healthy diet and moving your body around truly does have more positive effects other than weight loss. It affects your mental attitude and overall well-being. So take a look at your diet and level of activity. You might find that making a few small changes will greatly improve your life.

12. You don’t leave your comfort zone.

I know how easy it is to live in a comfort zone. In fact, when I go to a familiar restaurant, I always order the same thing. Not because I’m afraid to try something new, but because I like the food I normally order. But that’s not the kind of comfort zone I’m talking about. I’m talking about taking a risk that will improve your life. And keep in mind, there is a difference between a “risk” and a “calculated risk.” Any risk has the possibility to be deadly, but a calculated risk is one in which you’ve weighed all options and thus come up with a good, sensible plan of action.

13. You’re living a life you don’t like.

The way I measure success is by someone’s level of happiness. Are you happy? If not, then you should change something! Even a feeling of contentment or satisfaction doesn’t tell you that you’re living life to the fullest. Life should be exciting! So if you’re not enjoying life, take a look at some of the changes you can make to get you to a better place.

If any of these 13 points sounded like you, don’t despair. You can make changes. But the first change you need to make is getting rid of the idea that you can’t do it. Many times, your biggest obstacle is your own thought process. So start there. Change your thinking – then change your life!

Hip Opener - I say

Yesterday, my yoga teacher asked us what do we prefer to do at the yoga session.  I suggested hip opener.  She laughed and rejected it laughing .  She thinks that I am joking with her but I was serious.  After listening carefully to what I say, she calm down and say okay.

A hip opener is a routine exercise focusing on the hip and to widen it so that the hip and  our back side can sit squarely and firmerly on the ground. I was a hard exercise and we have only did it once.  She did not believe that I want such difficult stretching exericse as I often asked for an easier routine.

This illustrate how people can preconsive our intentions.  People try to read our mind and form an opinon that either I am joking or pulling their legs. However, the routine did not turn out well as it was a painful exercise and she forgot to teach us the breathing exercise to go along with it. I did not manage to get the experience I had felt before during the routine exercise.

It is a kind of funny why people form an opinion on others ? But , I believe that human beings are unpredictable and any human experience cannot be pre-define or the end result is not controllable.

What  I am trying to say is that the options are so vast and trying to read a person's decision is very difficult. But , I am not saying that it is impossible. When we put a rat in a maze and each time, we ring a bell, the rate will run through the maze in the same pattern to the food.  This is called mental control by creating a pattern.  However, we maybe able to hypnotize  a person or a rat but at certain point, the result could be different. For rats , it is a 100% but for human beings , the thinking and emotions could result in a different result.

If we invite a girl for a dinner for 10 times, it maybe a "no" for 10 times or a "yes" for 10 times and it also can be any number between "0" and "10".  The number of factors is very variable and unpredictable.

So, never think that , it can be never, never and never for ever.


Lunch with Sun Tze Khoe

I had an unexpected lunch  with Sun Tze Master Khoe Keng Hor.  It was really a surprise when my boss called me to join the lunch.  He told me that we will be meeting God for lunch and I know what he mean.  Mr Khoe always wear  white and God always appear in white.. But, this time he appear in white short pants with his naked sexy legs. What happen to him ??

I asked him why he is in shorts and he told me that he is having  a back massage after lunch.  A massage after lunch ? Ow , fantastic arrangements ?  A full stomach for the massage. Unbelievable.

Nevertheless, one of the topic is MH310.   He is the opinion that this is a US CIA operation for something valuable to USA and the plane was left to crash after getting the items.  He said that the Malaysian Government should engage 007 James bond in the first place and the case will be resolved very soon. There was a film called " live another day" where the rocket was intercepted and James bond managed to solve the case. Why spend so much time in the South China Sea and the Indian Ocean... Just sent for " Your Mejesty Service 007".

Another interesting case was his recent experience.  One day, he visited a coffee shop for lunch and the shop was very hot and he suggested to the owner to break down the wall to let teh air circulate and dig two holes to plan two green plants there but the owner rejected him. So, he shut up and went home.

After a month or so, he went back to the shop and he was very happy that the owner followed his advise. So, he called the owner and boast about his advise but the owner told him that he did follow his advise but instead engage a fung shui master to check his shop and teh fung shui master told him that his shop have very bad chi because his wall was resting on a dragon  and the dragon is unable to move freely. So after he break down the wall, the dragon was released and the chi become better. As for the two holes in front of the shop, the spots  is actually the eyes of the dragon and the trees are its eye brows.  After digging the two holes, the dragon now can see and the shop becomes more positive and attracts more customs.  He told me that to sell an idea, it is better to sell it with fantacies rather than honesty... we had a good laugh.

Another subject was on sex.  He said that he is not interested in sex but rather he enjoyed  the thrill to attract the oppersite sex and the fore play.  After ejeculation, he feel hopeless and tired. So , he prefer to keep the strength.  He told me that he will call me to do the final part in the future if I want to.  Haiyoo.... how can he do that ???? changing partners at the final spot.  So, I must be watching and waiting to do that ... what a waste.

We parted with a heavy stomach and a good time.  I really missed this guy.  Good talking skill and dramatic as well.  What a wonderful fella.


Sunday, April 13, 2014

A Fool's Game.

The street bulls

Today I have encountered a few bulls on the street. I was visiting my mum in laws cemetery at western road this morning and after the prayer as I was driving through the one lane road out of the cemetery, one car came in the Oppersite direction and refused to move. I stood my grounds and one young man jump out and asked me to reverse.

I stood my grounds firmly and he kept cursing and asked me to be considerate. I told him I cannot reverse because the roads are long and winding  and I asked him to back up to the side and let me pass through. By this time , the driver also poked out his head and asked me to reverse and I told him that this is a one way lane  and did he see the road sign? He told me that he did not see the sign. One of the cemetery worker intervene and asked him to reverse and he keep refusing . I stood my grounds and he keep staring at me and finally he reverse to the side and let me through. I give him a thumb up sign. He look so stupid and I hope God have taught him a lesson. If we are in the wrong , we have to listen for an answer and not to bulldozed our way through.

The next incident happen in the afternoon as I was waiting for my brother and sister at the lorong Kulit flea market. One Honda Accord driven by a lady driver at high speed into a one lane lorong and was forced to  park by the road side by on-coming cars and  during the break in the traffic she just drove forward to a side road and reverse back in the right directions amidst the cursing and swearing by the pedestrians. I was shaking my head while sitting in my car amazed at the stupid act of the lady driver. She could have reverse backward instead of continuing to antagonize the traders and shoppers there.

The stupid acts by these two drivers is amazing and illustrate  how people can re-act in this situation ie pointing fingers at other people instead of taking an logical way to resolve a problem. What have the world become ? Nuts.


Saturday, April 12, 2014

Karma: The four wives (ext)

Karma (The Four Wives)

“In one of the Agama Sutras, the Buddha’s early sermons, there is a very interesting story:

Once there was a man who had four wives. According to the social system and circumstances of ancient India, it was possible for a man to have several wives. Also, during the Heian period in Japan, about a thousand years ago, it was not unusual for a woman to have several husbands. The Indian had become ill and was about to die. At the end of his life, he felt very lonely and so asked the first wife to accompany him to the other world.

‘My dear wife,’ he said, ‘I loved you day and night, I took care of you throughout my whole life. Now I am about to die, will you please go with me wherever I go after my death?’

He expected her to answer yes. But she answered, ‘My dear husband, I know you always loved me. And you are going to die. Now it is time to separate from you. Goodbye, my dear.’

He called his second wife to his sickbed and begged her to follow him in death. He said, ‘My dear second wife, you know how I loved you. Sometimes I was afraid you might leave me, but I held on to you strongly. My dear, please come with me.’

The second wife expressed herself rather coldly. ‘Dear husband, your first wife refused to accompany you after your death. How can I follow you? You loved me only for your own selfish sake.’

Lying in his deathbed, he called his third wife, and asked her to follow him. The third wife replied, with tears in her eyes, ‘My dear, I pity you and I feel sad for myself. Therefore I shall accompany you to the graveyard. This is my last duty to you.’ The third wife thus also refused to follow him to death.

Three wives had refused to follow him after his death. Now he recalled that there was another wife, his fourth wife, for whom he didn’t care very much. He had treated her like a slave and had always showed much displeasure with her. He now thought that if he asked her to follow him to death, she certainly would say no.
But his loneliness and fear were so severe that he made the effort to ask her to accompany him to the other world. The fourth wife gladly accepted her husband’s request.

‘My dear husband,’ she said, ‘I will go with you. Whatever happens, I am determined to be with you forever. I cannot be separated from you.”

This is the story of ‘A Man and His Four Wives.’

Gautama Buddha concluded the story as follows:
‘Every man and woman has four wives or husbands. What do these wives signify?’

The first ‘wife’ is our body. We love our body day and night. In the morning, we wash our face, put on clothing and shoes. We give food to our body. We take care of our body like the first wife in this story. But unfortunately, at the end of our life, the body, the first ‘wife’ cannot follow us to the next world. As it is stated in a commentary, ‘When the last breath leaves our body, the healthy color of the face is transformed, and we lose the appearance of radiant life. Our loved ones may gather around and lament, but to no avail. When such an event occurs, the body is sent into an open field and cremated, leaving only the white ashes.’ This is the destination of our body.

What is the meaning of the second wife? The second ‘wife’ stands for our fortune, our material things, money, property, fame, position, and job that we worked hard to attain. We are attached to these material possessions. We are afraid to lose these material things and wish to possess much more. There is no limit. At the end of our life these things cannot follow us to death. Whatever fortune we have piled up, we must leave it. We came into this world with empty hands. During our life in this world, we have the illusion that we obtained a fortune. At death, our hands are empty. We can’t hold our fortune after our death, just as the second wife told her husband: ‘You hold me with your ego-centered selfishness. Now it is time to say goodbye.’

What is meant by the third wife? Everyone has a third ‘wife’. This is the relationship of our parents, sister and brother, all relatives, friends, and society. They will go as far as the graveyard, with tears in their eyes. They are sympathetic and saddened…

Thus, we cannot depend on our physical body, our fortune, and our society. We are born alone and we die alone. No one will accompany us after our death.

Sakyamuni Buddha mentioned the fourth wife, who would accompany her husband after his death. What does that mean? The fourth ‘wife’ is our mind [or Alaya consciousness]. When we deeply observe and recognize that our minds are filled with anger, greed, and dissatisfaction, we are having a good look at our lives. The anger, greed, and dissatisfaction are karma, the law of causation. We cannot be separated from our own karma. As the fourth wife told her dying husband, ‘I will follow you wherever you go.’”

Noor & Dean Cafe, Noordin Street,Penang..

Noor & Dean Cafe, Noordin Street, Penang

I was at the cafe today after my morning yoga session and it was not difficult to find. The concept was a good one serving Malay food in a Chinese heritage houses. The cafe occupied two heritage houses and it offers a non Aircon section and an Aircon section. Like all the heritage joints , it keeps the structure intact but with a new fresh of setup internally. The cafe offers 5 rooms for lodging and it ranges between RM300 to Rm35O per room  inclusive of free breakfast for two.

We sat in the Aircon section and I ordered a gado gado and a Char Koay Teow while my wife ordered a latte and a sandwich. We were surprise at the big portion of food. I enjoyed the gado gado which is a variety of vegetables, Tufo, eggs etc served with ground but source or satay source while the sandwich looks normal and the char Koay teow was with three big prawns and looks delicious.
The gado gado was very tasty and soft uwhile the char Koay teow was excellent. The latte was so-so and the price of the food was about Rm60 for two.

For me, it is another good experience having visit the places which was close to my heart as a child. I had a friend staying close by and I was frequently in his house when I was playing in a band when I was young. There were so many find memories.

To my readers , it will be a good experience eating Malay food in a China town.


Friday, April 11, 2014

On her way to a new experience

A new experience.

Today my daughter is going to Langkawi to start work in a 5 star hotel. I have insisted to follow her but she rejected me saying that she has already grown and do not like  me to baby sit her. I was upset but she got a point . She have been very independent since young.

I kept wondering how is she having to travel to Kuala Perlis and board a ferry to Langkawi. It will be an hour  and a half driving and another hour and half on the ferry.  Ow! Almost can reach KL. She is stubborn and I have to back off. I am quite confident that she can manage it as she has been to the island many times and many friends there. I am thinking if visiting her next week before my African trip.

Well, having see her growing up and finished her college diploma was a contentment and she told me that she needs to work to get the experience before going for her degree. There is hurry for her and I feel that she is right I her decision as there should not be any need to rush through education. LIfe is on a whole is a learning experience. So take it gradually and be happy.

In life , we travel to many places, meeting many people and experiencing many achievements or disappointments and this is pat of growing up. There is no need to be angry or sad. Time will heal and tomorrow is another day.

The other day my yoga teacher suddenly say that she believe that we are spiritual beings having human experience and I counter her that another thinking is we are human beings having spiritual experience. The difference between this two thinking is the concept of re-birth. If we are human being then we live for one life time but I we believe that we are spiritual beings then we we live life many times over.

Well, this is a debatable subject and let's leave for another day. To my daughter M, just enjoy your life and be happy.
You have to create your destiny.