Flying with one wing

I felt that I have been wounded , not physically but mentally.  I find flying at my previous speed is a difficult task and getting heavier, It is like flying with one wing and at half strength.  I am really tired and wound out, flew at half mast.

The core of my confidence is damaged  and shattered and I have a  sinking feeling like stepping into a quick sand,  One of my friend told me that this is the path for all human being ie we have to die someday. We have known it all the while and when we come to face it , we get shaken up.  What is the matter with me ?  The chair I am sitting is always there and when it broke down, I cannot accept it . There are some many permanent things in my mind. All the wrong illusions.

I have to re-look at myself and find the cause of the strange feelings. My whole body engine is like shutting down. I am throwing tandems and being very aggressive and angry at the same time with those people around me. 

My body is also behaving strangely , my eyes getting tired and blur , I am getting hard at hearing  and I start to have fainting spells , it is just like my body is falling apart bits and pieces.  What a horrible nightmare ?

I have to pull myself up , break the spell and rebuild my confidence and  kick off my fear.  I must be strong to face life and go on confidently in my path. I have to finish it nicely and gracefully.  That is the beauty of life.

Learn to dance in the rain and enjoy my struggle.

Namaste.