Our mind can be very messy like the fighting of the monkeys in our brain. We are aware of the disturbing thoughts and we want to control it. The more we control it , the more aggressive is the reaction. My adopted teacher , Ajahn Brahm advised his followers to be kind to the body or be kind to your sickness. We have to make friends with the pain so that we can seek their cooperation and make our body stronger or to recover.
I wanted to do it but it just "run fire" and get out of control making my mind and my breath fluctuating up and down. It is the practice to control our breath and we will control our mind but the repelling forces is too much , our brain activities often force our breath to lose control. The more we focus , the more disturbed we are. I think Ajahn is correct, let the forces go where they want and be kind to our body and then we gather the rhythm back into our breath.
Thoughts are be very disturbing , switching in and out of our body and making us very tired and disturbed and agitated at the same time. It is very funny how such disturbing thoughts can just flood up into our thoughts despite our months of training our mind to be still. the under current of our thoughts can be very powerful and it makes us breathless at times.
The only way is to continue to control our breath and our mind through practices and more wisdom. We are just human beings and not super beings and that is why we are so unstable as we have not attain the stage of control our breath and our mind.
We have to live with the twist of happiness and sadness . Buddha says that if there is happiness , there will be sadness as these factors sits in the extreme.. In order not to feel sadness, then we should abstain from happiness. But , happiness is what we want , so we have to endure the sadness. Not everyday is a good day for us , so we have to live and manage our bad days when it comes.
Namaste.
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