Yesterday, my staff was blowing his top after a meeting and I took him to Black ball for some cold drinks. Initially, it was only red bean and ice and I went to buy additional yam side dishes and later, I went to buy the black agar agar. My staff just eat, eat and eat and his mind was somewhere else.
I don't know what to say but just make jokes and sit with him to eat. He looks better but still his face was red and he told me when he think of what happen in the meeting, his anger rose again.
I know it is very difficult to control onc's emotion and ego especially when it is hurt and wounded. I can only help to make less tense and the rest of the matter is the choice of my staff. If he is wise enough, he will let go of the hurt soon and if it is not, then he has to fight with it and let time heal it.
He was scolded badly and as his boss, I was also indirectly been scolded. I also feel bad but the intensity and duration is not the same. I make my choice of letting it go as fast as possible as this negative thoughts have away to grip on to our emotions.
Different people absorb hurts differently and this skill has to be sharpen over the years. The older we are , we become more mellow and matured.
Yesterday, I had a farewell lunch with a Japanese colleague who is 68 years old and just retired from our Parent Company. He was a monster during his days in our company. He told me that after his retirement, he is totally relax and his blood pressure fell back to normal.
If we are able to see that what a person do to us when he is angry , then we know that it is not what he wants to be. Nobody want to shout and curse if he is in a good mood or not under pressure. Basically, everyone of us want to talk nicely and like to be liked.
I hope he will recover fast from his hurted ego, wishing him the best.
Namaste.
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