"This is only your opinion".

I got this lesson from one of my previous boss and when I disagree with him, he will tell me that my view is only my personal opinion. These words have struck me deep and I still remember the tone and the way he told me.  When I think it back, I realized that it is very true especially when it applies to the personal opinion of my own self.

In reality, we think we are very capable and we have been contributing a lot to our employer or having great achievements in our work.  This is what we think and when at assessment time, we find out that it is not in line or up to the expectation of our superior, we are shocked and upset. We see things in our own light and in our own perspective but it may not be such a great achievement or contribution according to our superiors' assessment. There is a mismatch of expectations and we cannot accept it or agree with it.  It is best to accept it and move on so that we remain calm and peaceful.  If we continue to dwell on such unhappiness, it will not change things as it is and it will have adverse effect on our health and outlook.  We cannot change the opinion or view of our superior and it is no point crying over spilled milk.

I have a colleague who asked me about the assessment of his staff and I told him that I don't know and he is worried that if his boss give less than what he promised to his staff , he will be in big trouble.  There is a potential problem here. How can he assess what another people's thinking or assessments. The chances is like a 70:30 percent.  More wrong than right. We can never predict or control the outcome of a person's thinking because there are so many variables and influences.

Another factor which will play up in us is our greed.  There is never enough. The sky is the limit and we can receive more or take more. How much is enough ? We always want more and more . We are never satisfied. Maybe, we should re-look at what we have received  and do some serious thinking about your Superior's limitation in giving us more. When he gives you more , other people will get less because he has a limited amount to give.  Try to look at what you get through his perspective  and understand its limitation. Like I mentioned earlier, the faster you accept or understand this matter, the happier you will be.

Often, we are tempted to talk about the rewards we received with our superior . How can you tell him that you should be appreciated more or received more ?  How can we tell him that we are unhappy and upset with the small rewards we receive ? It is not our Asian culture to talk about rewards and appreciation.  If we do not like the reward or the job, we just need to quit . No need to talk bad about not being appreciated or the behaviour of our superior . They are what they are and they have their own thinking.

We have to go deep within us to understand the wisdom. We should count our blessing  and trying to accept the fact , nothing is enough and we should re-look at the values in our life. There are much more things in this world that is worth our attention . Things like good health and happiness.  Having more may not be happy because we want more every year and once, we get less we are unhappy.  When there is happiness, there is sadness unless you have ultimate happiness. There is always two sides to a coin. Little means more or more means less , when we are strong , we are weak at other times.

So, lets look wider, take a step backward  and the horizon will be bigger and wider. Take a deep dose of fresh air and smile to yourself. I am happy the way I am now because I am important to my self.

Namaste.

( To all the disappointed person in this world, who felt that they are not appreciated. You have to appreciated yourself before others appreciate you. What is important is not what others rate or value you, you are as good as you think you are. So, show them ! )