Dedicated to those people born 1925 to 1970 : Bravo

TO :  ALL THE KIDS WHO SURVIVED THE  1930s, '40s, '50s, '60s and '70s!!

First, we survived being born to mothers who may have smoked and/or drank while they were pregnant.

They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can, and didn't get tested for diabetes.

Then, after that trauma, we were

put to sleep on our tummies

in baby cribs covered

with bright colored lead-based paints.

We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, locks on doors or cabinets,

and, when we rode our bikes,

we had baseball caps,

not helmets, on our heads.

As infants and children, we would ride in cars with no car seats, no booster seats, no seat belts, no air bags, bald tires and sometimes no brakes..

　

Riding in the back of a pick- up truck on a warm day was always a special treat.

We drank water from the garden hose and not from a bottle.

We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle, and no one actually died from this.

　

We ate cupcakes, white bread, real butter, and bacon. We drank Kool-Aid made with real white sugar. And we weren't overweight.

WHY?

Because we were always outside playing...that's why!

We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on.

No one was able to reach us all day.

--And, we were OKAY..

We would spend hours building

our go-carts out of scraps

and then ride them down the hill,

only to find out we forgot the brakes.. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem.

We did not have Play Stations, Nintendos and X-boxes. There were

no video games, no 150 channels on cable,

no video movies or DVDs,

no surround-sound or CDs,

no cell phones,

no personal computers,

no Internet and no chat rooms.

WE HAD FRIENDS

and we went outside and found them!

We fell out of trees, got cut,

broke bones and teeth,

and there were no lawsuits

from those accidents..
We would get spankings with wooden spoons, switches, ping-pong paddles, or just a bare hand, and no one would call child services to report abuse.

We ate worms, and mud pies

made from dirt, and

the worms did not live in us forever.

　

We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays, made up games with sticks and tennis balls, and

-although we were told it would happen- we did not put out very many eyes.

We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just walked in and talked to them.

　

Little League had tryouts

and not everyone made the team.

Those who didn't had to learn

to deal with disappointment.

Imagine that!!

The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law!

These generations have produced some of the best risk-takers,

problem solvers, and inventors ever.

The past 50 to 85 years have seen an explosion of innovation and new ideas..

We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned how to deal with it all.

If YOU are one of those born

between 1925-1970, CONGRATULATIONS!

What a messy life ..

I have a god-sister who have so many affairs that three of her children comes from three different boy friends or husband.  At 60 plus, she is still looking for her " second spring " but luckily, her production days are over.  This hippie style was in the 60's where flower girls smoking pots and practice free love was rampant. Now, this trend is over. The trend of this generation is young girls not getting married and prefer the single life. What is wrong with the world ?  The trend change from braless to fancy bra and then braless again. From the wet look , it changes to the dry look and from the hairy look to the baldy trend.  Everyone is looking for their signature.

Well, back to my god-nephew and niece. Now, they have grown up to be the man and women of the day , how do they look at the mother ? Do their mother careless of what the children think ? It is really a messy issue. One of them who is an English and Chinese parentage openly challenge and criticise her mother for her flirtious life stye , another one refused to look her in the eyes and the only son who is more forgiving, is giving her a monthly allowance so that she do not depend entirely on any stranger who took a liking in her.

She do not seem bother by her children's impression of her and she has a mixed breed dog , which she is taking good care and talking to her bitch more  than to her children. Maybe, she is practicing Buddha's teaching of nothing is permanent and the important thing  is the present. Ashes to ashes , dust to dust.  At the end, there is nothing and everything just vanished. ]]

It is a different perspective in life and she choose a path which is an easy way.  It is like a life that  fools rushes in where angels fear to threat. For all of you, do not think so much or considering judging her. Nothing is absolutely right or wrong. It all depends on your perspective in life  Whatever, she choose to be, that  is her choice and nobody have the right  to change that. Live freely now and let go all your bondage and do whatever you want when there is still time.

Namaste.

The first love is always the sweetest.

I have a friend who have a loving relationship for 12 years since her lower six in a school in Penang.  A school sweet heart and they pursue their degree in different country . One in Australia and one in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. They broke up because she cannot get along with her potential mother in law. We were on the way to my house in Air Itam and she broke the news that her former ex-boy friend stays near to my house. There was a crack in her voice and sadness in her eyes. I asked her if going near her-ex house is okay with her and she told me that he might have migrated. Our conversation ended as that .  She is now married and she has two child now and she told me that she is older than her husband for 4 years.  She said that she wasted a lot of time on her-ex and it has been painful.

I want to share this experience with those who have gone through this path in the same or more or less the same way and help them to release that hidden feeling if it has been haunting you at regular intervals when you  feel the bitter taste in your tongue whenever the memory pricks you and shakes up old feelings. Learn to let it go . Don't fight it , just watch it and let it go.

There is a saying " we should not hope for eternal but only the experience of once  having it ".  What is over is over but fond memories will keep us thrilled and inspired as we re-live it in our memory. Think of the good things that happen and count the blessing that the good things have happen to you.  But , it is over and it is no point crying over spilled milk but enjoy the taste of milk in our mouth.

There is always a internal demon who speed up our heart beats and make us upset when we think of the waste chances and opportunity.  So much time wasted which otherwise could be some thing better.  It is always correct from the hindsight. You have have a worse relationship  or a more painful experience.  You are what you are today is because of your experience.  You know how to handle your present relationship much better now.  You are now able to close one eye or both eyes on your current husband's indulgence or mistakes. You are more  forgiving and tolerance in your present relationship.  You have gain a valuable insight into yourself , knowing your weakness and how to manage them for a good relationship.  There is always something good that come out of a bad relationship.

I do not know whether your current relationship will hold in the future but for the present moment, enjoy and strengthen it for you and your family.  Nothing is forever as feelings will mature and mellow. Everything will evolve and during the evolution, we are alert and aware and watch it with intensify as it changes. There is a saying " mixing together is fine but staying together is a totally different ball game.". Like I have said earlier, there is something good coming out of a bad relationship  and that is , you are a  better person with a good experience.

So much for now. While you are at it , enjoy it and learn to dance in the rain.

Namaste/

One track mind - sins of hearsay (ext)

Camilla, the Duchess of  Cornwall  bought new shoes for her wedding. 
 
During the big day they became increasingly tighter and tighter as the day went on. 
 
That night, when the festivities were finally over and they retired to their room, she flopped on the bed and 
said, "Charles, darling, please remove my shoes, my feet are killing me..!" 
 
Her ever-obedient Prince of Wales attacked her right shoe with vigor, but it would not budge. 
 
"Harder!" yelled Camilla, "Harder". 
 
Charles yelled back: "I'm trying, darling!  But it's just so bloody tight!" 
 
"Come on! Give it all you've got!" she cried. 
 
Finally, when it released, Charles let out a big groan and Camilla exclaimed, "There! Oh, God, that feels so good!" 
 
In their bedroom next door, the Queen said to Prince Phillip, "See!  I told you with a face like that, she had to be a virgin!" 
 
Meanwhile, as Charles tried to remove her left shoe, he cried, "Oh, God, darling! This one's even tighter!"   
 
At which Prince Phillip said to the Queen,  "That's my boy! He served in the Navy: once a Rear Admiral, always a Rear Admiral!"
 

A RM21 million question?

Wo! it is a  whole lot of money. It will be be financial freedom for anyone who gets it . So, much dreams and hope can be achieved and life will be full of bliss. A few days ago, a deejay in Singapore strike a lucky draw at the Singapore International Airport and he became a millionaire.  I was also one of the participant when I was in transit to Bangladesh. I filled up a form and throw into side the ballot box but I was not the lucky one. The draw gave me a few days of hope and good dreams.  Well, the amount compared to the coming lucky draw is chicken feet..  Why do people used the expression chicken feet.  The feet is small but not the smallest of the chicken parts .  Well, lets leave it as that.

The RM21 million is the latest welfare lucky draw in Malaysia. Until now, there is no lucky  one to strike and claim the money. For moths, it has been accumulating and reach this enormous sum.  Don't be mistaken, I am not the promoter of the welfare lottery  but I am just draw into talking about it because of my wife. Lately, she is abit stress out because of her work and she has been talking about financial freedom if she strikes a lottery and live happily ever after with her retirement  abundantly taken care of.  She has been trying for the smaller draws in the past and every time, she is not the lucky one.

What I have said is the normal part of the story but sometime exceptional happen at our breakfast  this morning. A super salesman sold her twenty lottery tickets. This sales man was limping and he offered her a stalk of lottery with the continuous running number.  His logic is that the chances is higher if you have a set of continuous numbers. If not, you will cry yourself to death if the next number or the number before your number comes out winner.  A set of number will reduced such chances.  He also tells her that if she win , he also win because he will also get part of the price. Without hesitation , my wife took out RM60 to pay him. That guy got up smiling and limp away with the remaining stalks of continuous numbers for the next lucky or unlucky fella.

Yes, we live on hope and love. Without both, there is nothing to live for. Both these two factors inspire us to live our routine daily life which to some of us is listless.  We need spices to boost our life , for example , Coffee. It is another type of spice to boost our dull morning and lighten us up. But, the hope for financial freedom and a way out of our stressful daily routine is very common for all of us.  It is not that money can solve every thing but it definitely can help to make our life easier.  My wife told me that RM21 million is too much , she only needs RM3 million.  Well, I think she said that because it will be also very stressful to handle RM21 million. So, a smaller sum which can provide a good retirement life is sufficient for her.  Maybe, she will donate the RM18 million if she is the lucky winner in the next door. A lot of charitable organization will wish that she will win the next draw if she is committed to her wish to donate the balance of the winning money.  Fat hopes , fella but one a  million is also a single chance and who knows , it will happen.   The good thing is that the hope will keep her occupied until the next draw. The hope and dream will inspire her and stop her nagging about the stress o her work.  I am spared for the moment.

Folks, nothing is wrong to buy and have hope.  You may join in the fun and hope for the best.  You may decide to keep the full wining to yourself or gave half away or keep a smaller portion to yourself to relieve yourself over the  stress of too much money. To be contented is bliss. So , keep dreaming , Folks.  There is a Chinese saying " life is a dream" . So, this is another dream in a dream. Happy dreaming,

Namaste.

Temptation of the flesh

In the story of Buddha's enlightenment, at the final stage of his enlightenment, there was serpents, lightning, earthquakes and naked dancing women to frighten him , seduce and distract him. However, he win them all and he succeeded to attain enlightenment. At his spiritual level, he is tempted by naked flesh and what about the ordinary man.

The message today is " Sex is empty" . It is only a moment of pleasure .  Yesterday,, I met a friend  for lunch and he told me that there are abundance of China dolls in Penang and in Chinese villages all over the country.  My friend, PH stays in an apartment in the Jelutong Expressway. He told me that a lot of those China dolls  staying near his apprtment and they can easily recognized them by their look. These China dolls are working in karaoke lounge , mini bars and clubs as GRO. The word GRO is Guest Relationship Officer, a job title which was once an honorable job but now in shambles. It has become very frequent that we read of raids by Police in the newspaper and many of these GROs have been caught and deported or heavily fined.  I wonder what kind of life they are living.

I also have heard from friends who keep these China dolls as " friends" and they go home rich with Ringgit after a few years working part time or full time in Malaysia.  Back at home, they can start a new life or start a new business. A new beginning for them and their family rather been poor and never have a chance to live a normal life or a life of their expectation. Again, I wonder how they can force a smile to a stranger or bare the disgusting hands of their customers on their body or the rough handling by some crazy idiots amidst the worries and danger of been caught , jail and deported.

Yes, you may say that unless you are in the situation of poverty , you will never understand why they did it.  Looking from outside in and judging these girls is not fair.  Furthermore, who are we to judge them. To them, the body is a money tree and an asset and before it gets old and worn out, it is better to earn some money from it. The final condition of our body is same when it gets old and worn out and it do not matter  whether it has  been used or not. The final product is dust to dust and ashes to ashes. This is the principle of impermanence which Buddha is trying to teach us and make us understand that we have to let go of our ego, materials and desires.

I am not concluding that we should follow these China girls to waste our body since the end is the same.  But, rather each person have their own path to follow and a life to live. Each of us have our own expectation, principles and vision and no two person is the same. I feel pity for the China dolls if they earn a living by whatever means and not hurting other people.  If the end result of their manipulation  caused suffering to the people around them or breaking up families of their customers, these acts should be condemn. To these wicked people, remember you reap what you sow. As long as you do not hurt other people, there is no reason to judge you.

To these women of the nights, I pray that you  live honestly if you need to use your body to make money and I   foretell those who go out of the way to make money, do not hurt the people  who pay you the money.

Life is a passing smoke , live it  well.

Namaste.

A wonderful lesson in life (ext)

A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.

Moral of the story:
1. Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy
2. Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend
3. And when you’re in deep shit, it’s best to keep your mouth shut!

The power of our mind (extracts)

A blonde chick found herself sitting next to a lawyer on an airplane. Bored, the lawyer kept bugging the blonde wanting her to play a game of intelligence (lawyers like easy prey). Finally, the lawyer offered her 10 to 1 odds, said every time the blonde could not answer one of his questions she owed him $5, but every time he could not answer hers he’d give her $50.00. The lawyer figured he could not lose, and the blonde reluctantly accepted.

The lawyer first asked, “What is the distance between the Earth and the nearest star?” Without saying a word the blonde handed him $5.

The blonde then asked, “What goes up a hill with 3 legs and comes back down the hill with 4 legs?”

The lawyer looked puzzled. He spent nearly an hour, looking up everything he could on his laptop and even placing numerous air-to-ground phone calls, trying to find the answer. Finally, angry and frustrated, he gave up and paid the blonde $50.00

The blonde put the $50 into her purse without comment, but the lawyer insisted, “What is the answer to your question?”

Without saying a word, the blonde handed him $5.

What'd You Think?

It is not as bad as it seems.

When we are confronted with a problem, we often feel very worried especially when we do not have a solution. Our mind play tricks on us and our stomach is full of butterflies. Our hands gets cold and we sweat a little. This is more so if we have to explain in front of your bosses or in an interview. We always feel that the problem is bigger than it used to be. There is so much fear and our internal demons will take this chance to intensify the fear.

How do we manage our emotions in this case ? I have a colleague who would prepare his answers in a written form but before that he would think of all the possible questions which could be raised at the meeting.  He would spend the whole nite thinking and preparing the text. He became an expert in anticipation. If an question is raise during a meeting or presentation, he would look for the question and read out the answers. So, just imagine the amount of work and reports which he has to prepare before an event. Some times, there is no questions and his preparation will come to a null. It can be very wasteful and strenous in such exercise.  Some people said that " we do not plan to fail but fail to plan ". This philosophy is good but can result in doing too much over nothing. But, having said that, very few people can stand on their feet and think.  A prepared text will have a calming and soothing effect.

Rightly, we should know our subject well and train ourself in the basics of presentation. There are many techniques to calm ourself down and we should try to master some of them. Deep and slow breathing is one of the way , control your mind not to focus on the subject matter, some light exercise , rehearsal and have lots of confidence. The level of confidence can be improved through training and actual experiences. When I was young professional , I often sweat when I have to face my board members but now, I love to talk and present my subject slowly and surely.  I have fumbled alot but in the process I grow.

People said " success breeds  success" but I believe failure is the mother of success. Each time , we fall down , we should pick ourself up and clean up and walk with our chin high. Failure is nothing but a process for us to learn and gets stronger.  Nothing to be shameful. We are just not well prepared that is all. For each attempt, we should fall less and less and finally, we can do it with perfection. The sweetness of success comes from failures. After we fail, we will get know the sweetness of success.

When our child is young, they will learn to walk and in the process, these children will fall and sometimes, very hard but it is nature's way or in their instinct to pick themselves up and walk again. Don't be afraid to let them fall , otherwise, they cannot walk. In one of my previous article, I mentioned about the birth process of a cocoon.

There was a scientist who watch the birth of a cocoon. The cocoon have to squeeze itself through a tiny channel  before coming out as a beautiful butterfly. The scientist blamed Nature for causing so much pain and he decided to open up the tiny channel to let the cocoon to come through faster.  Yes, the cocoon came out faster but it cannot fly.  The tiny channel which the cocoon have to squeeze through is to let the fluid in the wings of the cocoon to squeeze out and also to straighten the joints and soft bones of the cocoon , so that when it came out as a butterfly, the wings are strong enough. So, don't be afraid of failures.

If you are not fearful of failures and you know your subject well and you keep to the belief that it is not as bad as it seems by controlling your mind. You will come out with flying colors like the beautiful butterfly. Flying in style and grace. Believe me, you have to believe in yourself before others can believe you.

Namaste.

Have you change or have I change?

I have been married 25 years already and have a puffy daughter called  May. Very frequently, I look at myself and wonder was I, the same me , 25 years ago. One old Chinese sage, Lao Tze said that nothing is static, everything is changing all the time. Well, I don't mean physically. Definitely, we will get old and die and our physical appearance will change as we get older.  Our hair will turn white, if we still have it , our teeth will drop which give us a dimple or sunken cheek and our skin will go lizard-like. No, no, no.  I am talking about our character. Can our character change over time and age ?

There is another Chinese saying " We can change the Dynasty easily but we can never change our basic character". Hey, why a China man can have so many things to say? Yes, a conflicting theory. Nothing is static and yet our character can never changed.

Yeah, after having some years in existence, I am qualified to say something , if not , alot of things. Yes, the basic character is very difficult to change.  The saying that "old habits die hard" holds alot of water.  Looking back 25 years ago before I got married. I have different focus and activities.  I was interested in making music and joining jam sessions. I was hoping around playing music with a group of friends; After I got married, I slow down and enjoy the honeymoon years with my wife and I become more and more serious in my job and earning money. I have a stretch of unlucky investments but in later years, it was much better . I managed to recover and make some money on my investments. Yeah, then I spend alot of time training May in pursuing her music and dancing.  Days turn to weeks and weeks to months and to years. Now, it is already 25 years after I got married . My activities slowed down alot and now I spend my time building up my health through Yoga and Taichi.  Yes, the activities have changed  but have I change ?

From m experience , No. I am basically the same fellow 25 years ago. My passion, my thinking  and my philosophy in life remained the same. I have grow wiser through experience, listening and reading but the basic me never change. It is funny when I look at my wife and I feel that she never age or change. The basic character remain and for myself, I have never change. The wise old man, Mr Lao is correct. Our basic character will not change over time. The basic is the basic , it just stay with us.

So, our childhood is very important and again, there is a Chinese saying , the first 10 years in our life will determine our character for the next 80 years. The education,l training , influence and experience we gave to a child will determine his basic character which will not change over time.  Believe, a child's education is very important. To know a tree is strong or not, we will need to look at its roots.

Like a 100 meters race, a proper start or kick off from the block will determine whether the runner can hit a sub 10 seconds or not. The start determines the end.  So, folks look at the mirror and you will see the you , 25 years ago.

Namaste.

What is a balance life..

I was told that the latest craze in Japan are books writing about having a balance life.  What is a balance life ? It is very subjective and only apply to working husband or wife.  Is 50% of our time at work and 50% of our time with family a balance life ? It is not so simple. It all depends on the need of the person concern, his hobby, life style and also the needs of his or her  immediate family or people close to them. It also depends on the married status of the person concern and what is his interest and position in his company.

After so many decades of hard work and dedication to their work, it is time to wake up and re-assess our life. The Establishment is always pulling us by the nose and some people are abused and force to work continuously until their death. There are reports in China that workers committed suicide at Japanese MNCs and this also happen in Japan.  In Malaysia, there are less cases but people committed suicide due to debts, emotions and other reasons instead of work. Are the people in Malaysia living a more balance life. No, there are definite cases of overwork in a rat race work or to earn more money.

Lets put aside suicide  cases involving debts, emotions and love but concentrate on work related issue. There is no fixed formula to determine what is a balance life  ? Some people need a longer sleep or rest or some bigger families need more time from each member or if there is some hyper-active child, the needs maybe more. Is 9 to 5 ,enough for us to do our job satisfactorily ? What about when we are involved in a project which have irregular schedules , is 9to5 enough ? How much time is enough to allocate to our spouse ? Is making other people around us happy while we are happy at work a balanced life ? Is happiness a barometer to determine whether we have a balanced life. So, many variables and there is no one fix.

Basically, there are a few things which I think is needed in a balance life. 1) Level of contentment 2) Enough rest  3) Enough financial means  4) Have a loving family  5) Pursuing a hobby 6) Healthy activities   7) Doing things that we like during leisure and working hours.  The most important criteria is loving our job and doing something we like in our job and leisure time.  My priority and choice is not the same as yours. Hence, it is not a standard and you have to find your own level. Go in within yourself to search for the balance.

Namaste.

Listen - lyrics ( Feel the message)

Listen to the song here in my heart
A melody I start but can't complete
Listen to the sound from deep within
It's only beginning to find release

Oh, the time has come for my dreams to be heard
They will not be pushed aside and turned
Into your own all 'cause you won't
Listen

Listen, I am alone at a crossroads
I'm not at home in my own home
And I've tried and tried to say what's on mind
You should have known

Oh, now I'm done believing you
You don't know what I'm feeling
I'm more than what you made of me
I followed the voice you gave to me
But now I've gotta find my own

You should have listened, there is someone here inside
Someone I thought had died so long ago
Oh, I'm screaming out and my dreams'll be heard
They will not be pushed aside on words
Into your own all 'cause you won't
Listen

Listen, I am alone at a crossroads
I'm not at home in my own home
And I've tried and tried to say what's on mind
You should have known

Oh, now I'm done believing you
You don't know what I'm feeling
I'm more than what you made of me
I followed the voice you gave to me
But now I've gotta find my own

I don't know where I belong
But I'll be moving on
If you don't, if you won't

Listen to the song here in my heart
A melody I start but I will complete

Oh, now I'm done believing you
You don't know what I'm feeling
I'm more than what you made of me
I followed the voice you think you gave to me
But now I've gotta find my own, my own

Listen - Dream Girls

This song " listen" was sang by Jeniffer Hudson in the film " Dream Girls" and last night, I saw a Filipino girl sang this song in "Glee". Her vocal power was fantastic and full of emotions and feelings. It was so touching. Incredible version of the song by her.

The song tried to convey a message that the person have grown up and have a mind of his or her own. Many at times, we do not notice this fact and keep imposing our ways on these young people. At times, our ignorance, shouting or scolding drown their words or we refuse to listen to them thinking that our way is always right and these young people do not know how to think for themselves. How can a young punk thinks better than us or know better than us? This can never be.  But , we are misguided. There will be a time when these young people want to stand on their own and they know themselves better and they have their own expectations in life.

For the older folks, the notion that they " eat salt more than the rice eaten by these young man"  is a serious hindrance to communication.  How can these young punks think better than the older folks ? This cannot be.  This is an "ego" problem. The faster we do away with this thinking, the more wisdom we can have. Don't let this big fat ego blocking your way to a better you. Open your heart and listen to these young people. Guide them if they are wrong.

Another wrong notion is that communication is about talking, The more talking we do , the better we communicator, This thinking is wrong. An important part of communication is effective listening.  Just open up your heart and ear to listen. If everybody starts talking and nobody i s listening , won't this be a problem ?  If everybody is talking at the same time, how can we communicate  Yes, shut up and listen.. We will be wiser and we will understand more.

Stop imposing your opinion and your thoughts on these young people who is becoming more conscious by the day. I am not accusing or imposing on you what is right or wrong.  We should quiet down and listen and we decide what is right or wrong after listening. Our biggest failure is that we do not listen and want other people to listen to us.  Lets reciprocate and live a more meaningful life.

So, folks.  Lets throw away our ego,  breakdown our wrong notion, throw away of colored lens . Open up you heart and listen.

Namaste.

Buddha mouth snakey heart - The Dharma.

This is a Chinese saying depicts the worse type of character. This type of people have a mouthful of wisdom and principles but have a evil heart.  They used "thick face and black heart " theory to get what they want.  They are for themselves, otherwise " the heaven be destroy and the earth will crack. The worst of the fakers and with evil and dangerous intentison.
In my journey through life, I have seen many of these type of low characters. Some of them are Buddhist, they chant, learn the Buddhst teachings, attend prayers and praise the Buddha and actually, they wear the Buddhist robes and gone on retreat and partakes in dharma sessions. But, they are extremely selfish and will manipulate others to the extend of hurting others to achieve their realized their targets.  I wonder if they have not learn the Buddhist teaching , what would be become of them. Maybe, they will be less evil.

The Buddhist teachings of the 4 noble truth and 8 fold path help us to understand and avoid suffering with a set of paths to guide our living and behaviour. If these superb teaching is unable to change fakers, then the damage could have gone deep into their core. I pray that these people will realize the truth and avoid to  be controlled by their evil intentions and bad emotions.

The Holness, The Dalai Lama have a wise saying " If you cannot help others, please do not harm them". But, these lowly characters will manipulate, back stab, hurt and kill.  Such evil will spread because the good people are not taking any actions and concentrate on improving themslves instead of others. However, we cannot blame the good ones for not taking actions because the good guys will have to stand up  and pull up these bad characters and could end up as "bad " people in the eyes  tof those people around you.

One of the Chinese saying which support the spread of such evil is " if things that do not concern us, we should not trouble our heart". This wisdom of not getting involved in other people's affairs which do not concern us is passive and counter productive. There are incidents of people dying or in trouble or crisis on the street but no people want to help them and only stand there watching. I hope and pray of a new thinking that if matters which do not concern us but hurt others, we should stand up or out to expose such intriques to prevent other people getting hurt or enforced the evil intentions of these lowly characters.

Nowadays, there is a new trend in Buddhism which is called  "Engaged Buddhism".  This style of Buddhsim is a practical approach to the  Buddhist  teaching which involves hands on experience and engagement  in the practice to understand the teaching.  This style will take away the passive nature of Buddhism.

So, on the look out  for these snakey fellas and highlight to the concern people  of such lowly characters and be skillful in exposing and handling them because they can be slippery and tricky. Their bites can be very painful as well. Fear not. For we reap what we sow. Righteous thoughts and actions are part of the 8 noble path to right living.

Namaste.

Unstoppable - The movie

I have just finished watching a film called unstoppable. It is a true story about a runaway train in the US  rail roads and the train was carrying 8 tanks of toxic and inflammable materials which have turn the train into a missile. Several attempts to stop the train but futile until two train drivers successfully hop on the train and stop the speeding train. If not for their bravery , a town of seven hundred thousand people could have been killed if the toxic material catches fire and explore.

As usual, the film is full of drama and  rhetoric  and entertaining. Putting all these entertaining stuff away, it shows that heroes are born out of crisis. When Evil spread its wings, an angel will be born. The weak will be strong and faint hearted will be brave. A crisis will bring out the strength in a person and will hold him together and will give him strength to stand tall and fight, Winning and losing is not important and by going through the process will be good enough.

We have heard of stories where people can lift cars to free victims during accidents or doing incredible feats when crisis confront them. The focus and the strong passion to do the right thing often draw the effort and strength to perform the extra ordinary.  Nothing is impossible if the right chemistry is at work.

We often ex amplify the situation before we confront it. The fear is the most crucial factor which undermine our strength and confused our focus. Sometimes, before we can do a thing, we already say that we fail or we cannot do it.  Such admission will caused us to lost half the battle before the war commence. When the two rail man needs to jump from a fast moving car on to a fast train, there was so much hesitation of the hero to jump and the word , " pussy" was final trigger which kick the driver to the jump and landed on the runaway train.

 Very often,we need the extra push before we take a leap or initiate a difficult action. It could be a word, a danger or a passion which make us to something different or special.  There is a Chinese saying " in difficult times, a hero is born". Basically, there is a hero in everyone of us and it depends on the timing,the occasion and opportunity  to show our bravery.

To all you good people . Do good everyday and use your unstoppable energy to stop the unstoppable train and make our life purpose driven.

Namaste.

My mum's guiding words

My mum have  passed away for more than 10 years  ago and my memory of her is fresh and clear. She worked hard for most of her life to support a family of 6 excluding my father.  A smart business women who is thrity and caring. I love her very much and she give me this sense of passion and love. I salute you , Mum.  She only complete her primary school but she is very wise with words and use simple idioms to guide us through over childhood. If you know Chinese, you will be able to enjoy its original taste and meaning and I have translated it in simple forms in English for the benefit of my English readers :

1) If you are careful, you can sail a ten thousand years old ship :
Once, I read an article about a man keeping a late 18th century old car in his original condition after he took over from his father in the early 19th eentury, he has been polishing and maintaining it until today in its tip top condition. He donated the car to his country's musuem.  Applying this concept to human beings, if one is careful about his healthy, he will  aged gracefully until  a ripe old age.

2) Used one bamboo to whip all the people on the same boat :
It means that if one person is at fault, you cannot hold all the people on the boat as guilty..

3) If you can eat the bitter of the bittest friut, you will be a man above men :
It means if you can tolerate hardship, you will be a class of your own, Higher than most men.

4) We know there is a tiger in the hill but we still advance towards the hill :
It means that even if there is danger, I choose to live among the danger and survive.

5) When you are steady and cool, you control the sky :
It means slow and steady win the race.  A complex problem can be solved by a steady hand.

6)If  your heart is greedy, it is like a snake swallowing an elephant:
Greed will kill you if you do not know how to stop.  The snake is choked to dead by  swallowing an elephant.

7) What is fated in our life, we will get but what is fated not to get, do not use force :
Leave everything to fate, whatever is going happen will happen and what is not, will never come.

8) Small man's heart, do not hope to exchange for a gentleman's fortune;
When you are a lesser being, do not hope for a big honor.

9) When you see your child live for a 100 years, you will worry for 99 years :
This means the undying and unconditioal love of a parent  for their children.

10) The changing of sun and moon is like running water, Time is like an  shooting arrow :
It means time waits for no one. It is unstoppable and uncontrollable.

11) When you drink water, you must appreciate its source:
It means when you recieve some benefits, don't forget the people who give you this benefit.

12) If you place one wrong seed in  a chess game, you will lose the whole game.
This means that we have to be careful with everything we do and one wrong step could bring us disaster.

13) If you receive some benefits, you should remember it for a 1000 years:
We should be grateful to our benefector forever for helping us.

14) One inch of time , one inch of gold but one inch of gold cannot buy one inch of Time :
No one can stop Time or buy time. If it is gone, it is gone forever.

15) Age and  Time spare no one :
Everyone  have to go through the cycle of birth, aged , scikness and death.

16) If you plant a righteous fruit, you get a righteous benefit :
You  reap what you sow.

17) If we do no evil, a knock on the door at 12 mid night would not be frightening :
If we do nothing wrong, there is no need to be scare.

18) We eat at the same table but we attain wisdom differently:
If we eat , learn and meditate at the same place, our pace of achievement in enlightenment is not the same.

19) Drink wine with friend , a thousand cup is not enough but if we do not share the same thinking, half a word is too much :
It means when relationship is in harmony, the rapport is strong but if the relationship is sour, the sight of  each other is already too much to bear.

20) On the top of the word sex is a knife :
In chinese chracter, the word knife is on top of the word " Sex" and it warms that excessive sex will kill, illegal sex will harm you,  dirty sex will kill us.  Abstain from unwarrant sex.

Namaste

This write up is dedicated to my mother , Madam Koe Ah Soo. I love you mum.
;

Love and fate

I haven't been calling my friend since end of last year and  yesterday, I took up my phone and called her to get her advise on some business issues and I asked her about her new year resolution. Spontaneously, she responded  that she wants to get a partner in life. I have arranged a few chances for her  to meet with some of my friends of mid thirties but there was no follow through by her because of her hectic work schedule. One of her, ex-staff got hitch last Saturday and perhaps, this event  prompted her to have this wish,

Love and fate is very funny. When you want it desperately, it evades you but if you do not want it that stupid cupid will knock on your door. For some people, it comes naturally but for some, you have to search persistently. 

For some, they are experts in falling in and out of love and treating it as an infatuation. Love to these Romeo and Juliet is like a hot air balloon. One moment, it is full of gas and flying in the sky like magic and the next moment ,  it fell straight to the ground when the gas dries up.

For some, they try so hard to please and change themselves so much to attract the opposite sex and ended up, wounded and worn out. Finally, leaving fate to run its path.  Out of pity, it can comes like a whirl wind and picks you up all the way. At times, it is stagnant  and motionless, with no further actions. This is fate.

I wonder whether I should continue to introduce my friends to her and I believe she is also trying very hard to find a partner. There is a Chinese saying " if you don't match make, for three generation, your family will  be blessed with good fortunes". I wonder whether there is any truth in this myth.  Anyway, I am a non believer of myth but am I doing her a favor or giving her  a disaster.  To some people, getting married is a different life together  and if you get a wrong partner, you will be doom for life.  There are so many unmarried women and they are living happily ever after. But, then again, there is a different kind of joy of getting married and have a family.  There is a lot of pain and joy and it is the same for unmarried beings. There is a lot fun and loneliness. Another question is that , it is so important to have a family to carry on your linage? This is a big question and I do not want to talk about this matter.

Like Samuel Hui's song, what you have fated in life to get , you will get it but what is not fated, don't force it. In three simple words " come what may". Leave it to fate and lower your expectations and open your heart.  Let your heart be born free again and may you get connected.  Let it come naturally and willingly.
To all those in love and those out of love, may you get connected with the right person and bless with happiness.

To my friend.  Best of luck and  I will try in my small little ways to encourage and connect you and you have to leave it to fate.

Namaste.

ABC's of friendship

Solaris in Mont Kiara

Have you heard of Solaris in Mont Kiara ?  Yesterday, I passed through it accidentally because I lost my way in Kuala Lumpur.  I missed a few turns and I landed among the condos and apartments of Sri Hartamas and Mont Kiara.  Yes, I have seen the name Mont Kiara several times when I was in Kuala Lumpur for business and in my mind, this is just another new township with bare minimum infra-structure.  I called my BIL, R and he came over to lead me to his home.

Before he head for home, he suggested I follow him to visit a place called Solaris. I followed his car and as I saw the Solaris, I just like it. It must be because of the chemistry. It is love at first sight. Full of excitement as I feel that the landscaping  and the layout of the shopping area is wonderfully done, with so much moving space. My BIL, R took me to the first floor of one the building and I was again amused and amazed at the flow of traffic below. Below me, there were flyovers criss crossing each other with traffic moving in different directions at the same time . From left to right and right to left  in harmony and it is just magic to watch the traffic in motion. What a wonderful world.

My BIL took me for a cup of coffee at a coffee joint which have their tables and chairs at the walk way.  It was a bit drizzling and the weather was perfect with less sun lights. I ordered a cup of latte and enjoy the atmosphere while slipping coffee. I was told by my BIL that the area is lined with pubs, entertainment and food joints. It is a place for foreigners and local yuppies who likes the night life. It is a place which never sleep or the people are night birds . They sleep in the morning and wake up at night. These are creature of the moon and maybe, one or two are wolves or vampires  in the making.  It was a wonderful experience , I felt so relax and good. It reminds me of another place which is almost heaven.

Years ago, I was requested by my employer to visit Switzerland on some credit issue. I went there with my colleague. He has a problem collecting some debts. Switzerland is really a beautiful place. After a sixteen hours of travel, we landed ourselves in a small business hotel. The room was very small, fit for one person and one single bed with the bare minimum. The lobby was managed only by two person. One is managing the counter and registration while another handles the cleaning.  Their food is eggs, butter, cheese, bread , milk and oats. Very basic food. The hotel was too small for both of  us and we just hop on the trains and move around the country.  We visited a Rolex watch factory and a one thousand years old church. Sorry, lets forget about the uninteresting details.

My point is in Switzerland, there are lots of road side cafe which serves drinks and food.  The temperature is about 16 C under bright sunshine.  It is so cooling and sunny. A very good feeling because you feel liberated. When you look up, you see the snow cap Alps in the blue sky and when you look out, you can see the beautiful lakes with yachts parked at the bay.The environment make you feel like you are in heaven. Full of fresh air, sunshine, flowers , water and  it is cooling.  You can slip coffee at the road side bar, just like in Solaris. Of course, Solaris and Switzerland are entirely two different places, but they serve the same purpose, that is to provide a place for rentertainment and relaxation.  A wonderful feeling of estacy.

Looking at the development, Solaris will continue to develop and evolved into a entertainment paradise which will compliment the wonderfully designed condos and apartments for locals and foreigners alike. I look forward to visit it at night , just to join the crowd  and cherish the estacy and joy.  I hope to meet some of you there. If you allow me , I will give you a big bear hug , lift you off your feet to enjoy the magic together with you.

So, see you there. Just open your heart and we will connect.

Namaste.

It is a materialistic world (extracts)

 A Solicitor  parks his brand new Porsche in front of the office  to show it off to his colleagues.
As  he's getting out of the car, a truck comes  speeding along too close to the kerb and takes off  the door before zooming off.
More than a  little distraught, the Solicitor grabs his mobile and  calls the police.
Five minutes later, the  police arrive. Before the policeman has a chance  to ask any questions, the man starts screaming  hysterically: 'My Porsche, my beautiful silver  Porsche is ruined. No matter how long it's at the  panel beaters it'll simply never be the same  again!'
After the man finally finishes his  rant, the policeman shakes his head in  disgust.
'I can't believe how  materialistic you bloody Solicitors are,' he says.  'You lot are so focused on your possessions that  you don't notice anything else in your  life.'
'How can you say such a thing at a  time like this?' sobs the Porsche  owner.
The policeman replies, 'Didn't you  realise that your arm was torn off when the truck  hit you.'
The Solicitor looks down in  horror.
'HELL!' he  screams........'Where's my  Rolex????...

What is Depression? (Depression #1)

Stuck in transit

Now I am stuck in Bangkok International airport for 4 hours, waiting for the connecting flight to Penang.  Just flew in from Chittagong and the airport was so foggy that the flight have to be delayed for take off. The temperature was cold in Dhaka and Chittagong.

The flight touch down at 2 pm , Thai time. Bangladesh is two hours behind  Malaysian time and Thai time is one hour behind which makes Bangkok, a mid way between Bangladesh and Malaysia. Well, it is not exact but  quite correct as an estimate.

The Thai Airport is segmented into East and West wing when you are coming into Thai Airport terminal from the plane but after you clear the check in counter which is a level above, there is four segment , leading to North, South, East and West. The whole passage way is linger with shops , shops and shops.  From brand name apparels to fast food chains serving coffee, selling souvenir and food.  There is a different shop called " Chang". It means "elephant" in Thai language.  It is a Thai massage outlet and it charged US$23 per hour.  This is a place to seek relief and stress from the travel especially from a place like Bangladesh.  During the massage, you can catch up with your  sleep  and if one hour is not enough, you can add as many hours as for a hefty amount  if you want but it can be pricey.  This is exactly what I did, I got a foot massage and I doze off for one hour. Mind you, for those thin skin beings, it can too painful for comfort and you can request for adjustment to moderate the pain.  Without pain, how can we get comfort and pleasure. Sorry, the comfort  will come after the pain.

Another good past time is the Internet service. That is what I am doing now writing to enlighten you on this service. It cost 250 Baht for an hour of " brain exercise"  and passing the boring time at airports.

The food is OK is you have a simple choice but the standard of  English at some food joints are not so good. This funny incident happen to me when I gave a US$50 for a 180 baht food juice. The lady at the counter told me that she don't have enough US$ for a change and offer to give me the change in Thai Baht. I refused because I need US$ and she sent one of her helper to get the change but she came back and told me that the Airport Authority only allow transit passenger to exchange for foreign currency and  forbid the local  business  people  to exchange foreign currencies.  It was quite strange and I offered to pay her in Ringgit and they told me that Ringgit is not accepted in Thailand. She told me that it is difficult to use Ringgit in Thailand.  I was abit cheeky and told her that Thai Baht is also not usable in Malaysia. But this is not true.  Anyway, to cut the story short , I accepted the change in Thai Baht and walk off.

During the negotiation to change the currency , she told me that she will " change you" and asked me to wait. I reply that she needs to change the currency and not to change  me. What she mend is that she will change for me and asked me to wait. But, she skip the word "for" and it became  "change me".  This could be a lame joke but it keeps me amused for a few minutes and let me pass the difficult time.

At this time, I am still waiting for the connecting flight and for those resting at home, treasure your time with  your family members. In the difficult transit time , when you are stuck in motion, you will missed your family and the good time you have.  Stay at the present moment and cherish whatever you have.

Namaste.

Best wishes to you, SSK.

To my friend. S2. Today is your big day and you must be excited. By now, you will be dressed up and your relatives and friends is gathering in your home in Klang. Your heart will be filled with excitement and uncertainty. The excitement because you will be the star of the occasion and you will be making a lot of people around you happy. However, you will have a slight feeling of  uncertainty as the back of your heart  as you do not know what the future will bring since both of you will be distant husband and wife after your marriage as both of you are working in different countries.

There is a Chinese saying " it is good to see each other but living together will be difficult " or  " the days will passed and you will see the true heart" . These words are not to frighten you but to prepare you to see the reality.  Maybe, the element of  " absence make the heart fonder"  will balance the clash of the true colors. Yes, like I say before ,there is such a thing as love at first sight and the relationship remained rock solid after that. There are relationships which matured over a period of time and end in marriage and there are long term relationship which lasted for 10 years like your case and finally, ended in marriage. Such long term relationship could have collapse easily but your decision to marriage could have save the relationship. Many other people are not so lucky. I have several friends which have this type of long term relationships and they have mixed results.

I am still in Bangladesh at this moment and I am sorry that I cannot be present at your wedding. However, I have promised you a gift from back water country.  I hope your best pals are there for you and make your occasion a memorable one.

As a friendly advise, to make the chemistry work. It takes a lot of hard work, patience and understanding.  There are several phase in the relationship. First phase is period of knowing each other , second phase is becoming friends and the third  phase is getting married.  The first two phases are  wonderful experiences where both of you will do a lot of things for each other and there is a lot of understanding and tolerance.  When you move into the third phase, you must be prepared to accept the maturity phase where love will turn into care. The passions will subside and the caring will take over. There will be occasions of disagreement and heated argument and take these occasions as the joy of a family life,  Please do not expect the intensity of the love to last forever as it will fluctuate like the Malaysian stock exchange. One moment on a high note and the next moment, there is a terrible argument. Be contented in life and adjust your expectation as life goes on.

Your experience and training as an Accountant and auditor could be a hindrance to your relationship. The earlier, you know and accept it will be better for the relationship.  Your demand for transparency and accountability will put a strain on your man.  In personal relationship, there has to be a little secret or some skeleton in the closet unlike the Corporates you have working with which you have demanded an answer for all your questionnaires.  Some personal questions could ended up in unclear terms or slightly blur and at times, you have to let it go.  Do not demand for an accountability for every penny or cents. There are expenditures which it is better not to know and leave it as sundries or classified as "others".  Use your judgement wisely and  give a big tolerance to  materiality, Not 5% but as much as 30% . Never query the sensitive items like monthly expenditure for your mother or father in law. Even in cases for sisters and brothers. Some family is very closely knitted and you must give space and face to you man. Space for him to grow and live freely and face for him to face his family members.

 For me, I am really worry that your basic education background and your training will stand in the way of a happy relationship. Old habits die hard  and sometimes, your personal intuitions take over your logic. Like the head leads the heart. Remember, it should be the heart leads the head.  A warm heart and a cool head.  Always check your response three times before saying it out. Once the words leave your mouth , it can never be taken back. There is a Chinese saying " Trouble comes out from our mouth and sickness comes in through our mouth", Think thrice before you act.

Sorry, having to say so many times in the best day of your life.  I wish you all the best and hope your have an everlasting love or " white hair together till the end".

All the best from Bangladesh.

Imee Ooi - Great Compassion Mantra - Chú Đại Bi (MP3 Download)

For a few dollars more...

I was flying from Bangkok to Chittagong on a Bangladesh international flight and we were delayed 30
minutes waiting for some passengers from a connecting flight. When I was at the terminal, it was only two of us , my colleague and myself waiting for the plane from Bangkok. Then, all of a sudden many Bangladeshi came in to join us at the waiting bay as a connecting flight came into Bangkok international airport.

All of us check into the plane and we were all seated, there was this passenger, who bring along with him three big begs. He could not stuff the banks in the overhead lockers as it was too big and bulky  and he just place his begs on the empty chairs beside him. He was sweating profusely and was standing to cool himself down. After a few minutes, he then took out a can of perfume. A big can and spray the perfume into his both sweaty armpits  and there was a sudden fragrance in the plane. He continued to stand and smile until a stewardess asked him to place his begs properly. He took the begs and stuff it into the gaps between two seats. I think that is the best thing he can do as all the overhead lockers were full.  It was so dangerous and the stewardess could not do anything else.

Then, there was an announcement  that the plane is going to take off  and suddenly, someone shouted to stop as one of the passenger's friend was not yet on board. This protest followed by a few rounds of negotiation between the stewardess and the passenger.  The plane stalled to wait for the missing passenger for about 15 minutes and finally, it could not wait any longer and the plane took off after a delay of 30 minutes. I was watching the actions with amusement. Is this  a wild wild west show ? No rules and regulations. It was like a fish market with people moving here and there so loosely.

At dinner tonight in Chittagong , I was complaining to my local host that Bangladesh will not improve if there are so many interpretation to a simple regulation. By allowing loose interpretation, it will create a lot of warlords within the Administration which leads to corruption and confusion. The country is forever battling this stupid act of human beings interpreting each act and regulations  to his or her advantage.

It is very surprising that the local Bangladeshi is accepting such practice and told me that it is their local culture to use money to resolve all the problems coming out of the interpretations. It creates another group of interpreters of the law and regulations.  Perhaps , this is a good way to create jobs for the people. There is a saying that "if a sea water fish is placed in a fresh water pond, it will gradually turn into a fresh water fish" or  " if you choose to live close to a black guy, you will also turn black". All of us can be brain washed and guide to live a different life for good or bad.

There was a story of a frog. If you place the frog into a warm water and as you hit it up, it will not re-act and finally, it will get steamed. This is the danger of stutle daily influence you cannot see.  The environment is changing you without you knowing it.  We are constantly changing to adapt to the prevailing circumstances until we turn from white to black.

So, who would like to go to Bangladesh ?  If not , for a few dollars more.  If you have a strong mind, you change the environment which surrounds you and if not, you will be changed by your environment and circumstances. Don't be like the frog, not knowing that the heat of the water is getting hotter. Raise your awareness by keeping healthy and alert.  Keep your self in touch with the changes besides you and don't sink into complacency.

Namaste.

"This is only your opinion".

I got this lesson from one of my previous boss and when I disagree with him, he will tell me that my view is only my personal opinion. These words have struck me deep and I still remember the tone and the way he told me.  When I think it back, I realized that it is very true especially when it applies to the personal opinion of my own self.

In reality, we think we are very capable and we have been contributing a lot to our employer or having great achievements in our work.  This is what we think and when at assessment time, we find out that it is not in line or up to the expectation of our superior, we are shocked and upset. We see things in our own light and in our own perspective but it may not be such a great achievement or contribution according to our superiors' assessment. There is a mismatch of expectations and we cannot accept it or agree with it.  It is best to accept it and move on so that we remain calm and peaceful.  If we continue to dwell on such unhappiness, it will not change things as it is and it will have adverse effect on our health and outlook.  We cannot change the opinion or view of our superior and it is no point crying over spilled milk.

I have a colleague who asked me about the assessment of his staff and I told him that I don't know and he is worried that if his boss give less than what he promised to his staff , he will be in big trouble.  There is a potential problem here. How can he assess what another people's thinking or assessments. The chances is like a 70:30 percent.  More wrong than right. We can never predict or control the outcome of a person's thinking because there are so many variables and influences.

Another factor which will play up in us is our greed.  There is never enough. The sky is the limit and we can receive more or take more. How much is enough ? We always want more and more . We are never satisfied. Maybe, we should re-look at what we have received  and do some serious thinking about your Superior's limitation in giving us more. When he gives you more , other people will get less because he has a limited amount to give.  Try to look at what you get through his perspective  and understand its limitation. Like I mentioned earlier, the faster you accept or understand this matter, the happier you will be.

Often, we are tempted to talk about the rewards we received with our superior . How can you tell him that you should be appreciated more or received more ?  How can we tell him that we are unhappy and upset with the small rewards we receive ? It is not our Asian culture to talk about rewards and appreciation.  If we do not like the reward or the job, we just need to quit . No need to talk bad about not being appreciated or the behaviour of our superior . They are what they are and they have their own thinking.

We have to go deep within us to understand the wisdom. We should count our blessing  and trying to accept the fact , nothing is enough and we should re-look at the values in our life. There are much more things in this world that is worth our attention . Things like good health and happiness.  Having more may not be happy because we want more every year and once, we get less we are unhappy.  When there is happiness, there is sadness unless you have ultimate happiness. There is always two sides to a coin. Little means more or more means less , when we are strong , we are weak at other times.

So, lets look wider, take a step backward  and the horizon will be bigger and wider. Take a deep dose of fresh air and smile to yourself. I am happy the way I am now because I am important to my self.

Namaste.

( To all the disappointed person in this world, who felt that they are not appreciated. You have to appreciated yourself before others appreciate you. What is important is not what others rate or value you, you are as good as you think you are. So, show them ! )

Prem Rawat / Maharaji "The Perfect Instrument"

Can we be humane and humble ?

I have read a story of a lady who help a dirty old man off the street and provide him a decent breakfast and I have read of a lady who extend her clean hands to touch a dirty street urchin. Can we lower our self esteem to dwell among the poor, destitute and stinky folks.

In India,  the Ganges is full of dirt, rubbish and ashes of deceased  and yet, thousands of Indians carry out their morning prayer and wishing in the Ganges. Their faith is so strong that however polluted the Ganges is, it is still bearable to these faithfuls. Doing the daily ritual there is also a bring a person to their senses and reduce their egoistic feelings of self importance.

I was in Bangladesh and my colleague in the new joint venture company told me that he has advertised to recruit workers and hundreds rush to be interviewed for a position of 60 people. He told me that most the workers have 10 years experience and their age is only 23 years old and their physical appearance is like a 40 years old. Their life span and expectancy is very low and the most difficult thing is that they are very smelly. Some of them have not been taken bath for a few days and they are very stinky and it is almost unbearable.  After the interview, they need to use perfume spray to clear off the smell to make the office more bearable.

For this, I can vouch that he is telling the truth.  In December 2010, my previous trip to Bangladesh, my colleague and I went for scouting in the outskirt of Bangladesh.  The name of the place is Palash. We drove for one hour to reach Palash and we need to cross the river.  To do so, they have a wooden boat with a motor to sent us across the river. It was managed by a boat man. When we reach the other side of the river, we have to walk a blank to reach the shore and this boat man will be there to hold our hands as we walk the wooden blank and he had the smell of a person who have not been taken birth for ages and his hands are so dirty. I almost vomited but I managed to hold back.

On one side, you are taught to be understanding , loving and passionate but we have to ask the question why. There is no reason to have the smell of a caveman or a similar smell of a dead rat. It is a basic hygiene issue.  Why can these people just take a regular bath and keep a clean image ? Why is it so difficult ? Just because they are heart broken or broke , can they maintain some  decency and hygiene ?
It is not only a matter of compassion and love, it is a matter of being responsible and fair to the human race. Why do we have to throw rubbish everywhere when there is a dustbin ? All of us have to chip in and make this world a better place for us to live in. If you can organize the things on your desk within minutes why you need to have a disorganized desk ?  Plain lazy and irresponsible.

My point in this message is that if there are good reasons to be compassionate and loving, we should  go all out to it but it is an irresponsible act or laziness, we should blindly do it just to show the whole world we are caring. Everybody have a part to play and lets play it fairly.

Namaste.

Once I was in deep meditation....

There was once, I was in a very deep meditation and I was unable to touch level again. It was in Langkawi Berjaya Hotel and in one of those wooden chalets on the hill slope and it was an early morning. The weather was fine and with greenery all around me and I was sitting in a loose lotus posture. There was a cool gentle breeze blowing lightly and it was very comfortable.

The place was right , the timing was right and the weather was perfect and I was in the mood for a deep relaxation. I sank deep within by concentrating on my slow and gentle breath. It was all peace and tranquil. I was physically there but yet I was not there.  I melt and brand into the atmosphere, without any feelings and thoughts. Totally non-existent.

Just where am I ?  just lost in space, vanished into the air, move to another dimension or Universe or just in another room. I don't know. I was just in a void. Motionless, shapeless, formless and weightless. Completely blank.

Some Yogi will tell you that they see lights , bright lights  which changes its form or see saints or Gurus and it is so peaceful, they will stay at this level and is reluctant to get out of that stance. This is very dangerous as you may stay in that dream state and refuse to accept reality which is crude and cruel. It is advised that you should have some basic training before you enter into that phase of deep meditation. Otherwise, you will be confuse and refuse to eat and drink and focus your attention in enjoying the peace within you.

There was a story in India. A housing developer bought a hill slope and hope to develop it into a housing estate. He moved his equipment and man into the area to clear the slopes for development.  They can upon a cave where the entrance was block by a big rock.  They decided to move away the big rock and they found the cave. The men light up their touch and went into the cave.  They found a Yogi . His hair was very long and it wrap around his neck and body. His finger nails was very long and his clothes were very dirty and torn. His eyes were closed and there was no breath.  The men thought that the Yogi is dead and when they try to move him, there was a soft voice telling them not to move him.  The men was shocked  and they let the Yogi alone and went out of the cave and push the big rock to cover back the entrance. The men found out later that the Yogi was in existence for a thousand years.

Yogis are able to live on very little food and water. There are stories that Yogis can survive on a single grain of rice a day and one breath is as long as a 50 slow counts. This is not a feat for a simple average man and this is through deep and gradual self development to achieve that stage of deep meditation. The sitting posture of the Yogi is very important and it has to be firm and stable and full focus and concentration on the breath and a single thought or thoughtless.

I am not an expert but a simple practitioner. I have accidentally touch a deep level of meditation and I have enjoy it very much but have not strike the same cord again since the first time , some time ago in Langkawi.  It is a wonderful experience and it is no harm if you can learn the skill which can change your self and provide an opportunity for you to experience the wonderful peace and bliss within you.

All the best to all of you if you wish to seek the quest.

Namaste.

I lost my cool .. Mr Anger, you win.

I lost my temper this afternoon and I blasted that fellow on the other line for showing no respect to an Elder like me. The type of temper which I encountered this afternoon is a bit strange. My temperament was even and stable but I raise my voice and cut that fellow short.  I did not waste time on him but just cut him short by refusing to talk to him anymore. This is the second time that I have this strange feeling. I was able to cut short the argument and cool down fast.

The  last time was on New Year's day at Gurney Plaza.  I was queuing up to pay for my new shirts and until my turn, my wife have yet to finish her selection and I apologized to the next two person and requested them to go ahead to pay for their purchases.  Behind me was a middle aged lady, she looked unhappy with my movement. I ignored her but a few minutes later, her son came and asked her why she allowed me to jump queue. I try to explain to him that I did not jump queue but merely switch with the other two person.  I speak to him in English but he asked me to speak to him in Mandarin. It is not a problem to speak in Mandarin but from the look on his face, I know he is teasing me or "play play" with me. I maybe wrong to assume that he can understand English  but the percentage of not understanding English is very low if he is a young man in his early twenties.  I just cut him short and  refused to talk to him. Period. That was the first time, I have this strange feeling of switching myself off  logically.

I noticed the change in me. In my younger days, I was a fighter and never back down from a fight even if I am at a disadvantage.  I stand firm but lately, I noticed my strange behaviour by backing off from any further argument and entanglement.  I feel like I am losing the steam or power to confront. It seems wasteful and tired. I think this re-action is because of age. This is what people called "mellowing". Old bird must return to its old nest.

For good or bad, I do not know but definitely, I could feel the change. At work , I start to hate confrontation and I hate it when I am drag into some dispute. I just want to do my job peacefully and use what I have got to contribute to something creative and beneficial to the next generation. I do not understand why people can carry out so much office politics or plot agenda to avoid work or to attack their adversary. I just want  to stay away from such skirmish rhetoric person. These people upset my stomach. People who can reveal our confidential discussion just to project themselves better. What a horrible fellow.

I am sharing this experience with you that a person will change with time and we keep evolving . Nothing is static.  Round and round, we go again with the changes. We have to be prepared and move with the changes, accepting and understand the changes and manage it well to bring good health and bliss to our mind and body.  I hope my change is for the better and so is your change.

Namaste.

What goes around, comes around - chapter 2 (extracts)

His name was Fleming, and he was a poor Scottish farmer. One day, while trying to make a living for his family, he heard a cry for help coming from a nearby bog. He dropped his tools and ran to the bog.

There, mired to his waist in black muck, was a terrified boy, screaming and struggling to free himself. Farmer Fleming saved the lad from what could have been a slow and terrifying death.

The next day, a fancy carriage pulled up to the Scotsman's sparse surroundings. An elegantly dressed nobleman stepped out and introduced himself as the father of the boy Farmer Fleming had saved.

'I want to repay you,' said the nobleman. 'You saved my son's life.'

'No, I can't accept payment for what I did,' the Scottish farmer replied waving off the offer. At that moment, the farmer's own son came to the door of the family hovel.

'Is that your son?' the nobleman asked.

'Yes,' the farmer replied proudly.

'I'll make you a deal. Let me provide him with the level of education my own son will enjoy If the lad is anything like his father, he'll no doubt grow to be a man we both will be proud of.' And that he did.

Farmer Fleming's son attended the very best schools and in time, graduated from St. Mary's Hospital Medical School in London, and went on to become known throughout the world as the noted Sir Alexander Fleming, the discoverer of Penicillin.

Years afterward, the same nobleman's son who was saved from the bog was stricken with pneumonia.

What saved his life this time? Penicillin.

The name of the nobleman? Lord Randolph Churchill .. His son's name?

Sir Winston Churchill.
Live like nobody's business :
Someone once said: What goes around comes around.
Work like you don't need the money.
Love like you've never been hurt.
Dance like nobody's watching
Sing like nobody's listening.
Live like it's Heaven on Earth.

The spring air is kissing my face.

Yes, this is the title of a Mandarin song. An old Chinese New Year song.  I felt the spring air is kissing my face and this remind me of spring.  Some elderly people have heard this song over and over at every CNY festive season. The restaurants and the supermarts will be the first one to play this song and it is kind of bore for some people. For me, it brings a beautiful feeling and a feeling of a happy childhood.

Spring is the most beautiful season as the snow melt, the warm returns and the color of the season change, From the pure white snow to brighter days to come with more sunlight and a cold wind. You can walk under the sunlight and yet you don't feel hot. It is a warm and comfortable feeling.  A brand new year with a brand new start with new expectations and hope. A hope for a better year and at the same time, memories rushing through of head. The memories of past years . Tons of it. We relive the good old years and be reminded of some sadness and unhappy occasions. We should throw these sad memories out of our mind but yet it sinks deep in our memory. Yes, yes, yes. Lets have fresh hope and we move on to be a better person to all the people around us , near and far.

Yet, the Spring remind us that another year have passed. We are a year older and nearer.  Nearer to what ? Yes, we can choose not to think about it and ignore it. But, it don't go away. A fact is a fact. Our physical body will tell us. Especially the lines on our face and our hair is turning white if it is not already white. Unless we keep up with our daily exercise, we can feel the energy and our strength slipping away.  Our joints starts to be painful and our eyes starts to be blur. This is the natural cycle of life and nobody can avoid it. The phase of the twilight years.

Yes, we are getting old but we can do something about it. We can change our mindset and treat age as a number and carry on doing what we have been doing . Why should we slow down and why do we need to feel the age?  We can remain active and enjoy the beautiful moments and breath in the spring air.  It will rejuvenate our feeling of youth. Nmmmm.... so fresh and empowering. We should not do this only in the Spring. We can sleep early and wake up early to have the same feeling.  Treat each early morning as the beginning of Spring. The air is cool and fresh. Treat each morning as the start of a new year because it is a new day. Treat each new day as a new start because yesterday is dead and gone. No need for us to wait , wait for a new year to have this feeling of freshness and a new beginning.  It is all in our mind and it is within us to change this thinking.  If you want, you can play this song every day to remind you that it is a new beginning.

Now, it is only 6.30 am and I am breathing in the fresh air and feeling rejuvenated with the near Spring air kissing my face. It feels good and I am appreciating it. It is a brand new day and I am feeling good. I hope of you reading this blog can feel what I feel , a feeling of joy no matter where you are and  how you are.  It is within you to change and you to change your way of thinking and your thoughts. Nobody can do it for you.  Start to enjoy the song instead of treating it as a bore . It has its magic of reminding you of the good memories and a new hope.

Ow! it feels good ... so fresh, empowering  and peaceful ... it is just like magic.  Bring out your appreciative attitude and you will know what I mean.

Namaste.


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Best day of my life (extracts)

 
Today, when I awoke, I suddenly realized that this is the best day of my life, ever!
There were times when I wondered if I would make it to today; but I did!
 
And because I did I'm going to celebrate!  Today, I'm going to celebrate what an unbelievable life I have had so far: the accomplishments, the many blessings, and, yes, even the hardships because they have served to make me stronger.
 
I will go through this day with my head held high, and a happy heart. I will marvel at God's seemingly simple gifts: the morning dew, the sun, the clouds, the trees, the flowers, the birds.  Today, none of these miraculous creations will escape my notice.
 
Today, I will share my excitement for life with other people.  I'll make someone smile.  I'll go out of my way to perform an unexpected act of kindness for someone I don't even know.  Today, I'll give a sincere compliment to someone who seems down.  I'll tell a child how special he/she is, and I'll tell someone I love just how deeply I care for her and how much she means to me.
 
Today is the day I quit worrying about what I don't have and start being grateful for all the wonderful things God has already given me. I'll remember that to worry is just a waste of time because my faith in God ensures everything will be just fine.
 
And tonight, before I go to bed, I'll go outside and raise my eyes to the heavens. I will stand in awe at the beauty of the stars and the moon, and I will praise God for these magnificent treasures.
 
As the day ends and I lay my head down on my pillow, I will thank the Almighty for the best day of my life.  And I will sleep the sleep of a contented child, excited with expectation because I know tomorrow is going to be the best day of my life, ever!