Yesterday, I met a long lost friend, S and she got married for about three years and she got a child of two years old. She talk about her unhappiness with her marriage to her current husband as the idea of divorce came acrose her mind. The main reason is that her husband is working in a foreign land.
When I heard of her view, I was quite taken back because she was only married for about three years and the difficulties of a marriage really bites her hard. I asked her whether she still love her husband or not and she told me that there were certain incidents which make her see the true person in her husband. For example, her husband have severely scolded her mother a couple of times. To her, this is not acceptable as in Chinese culture, we have to respect the elderly. Sadly speaking, the culture of respecting the elders is really getting less in the Gen Y and Z era. The young of today is so independent, rebellous and stubborn and they have their own opinion in their live. The breed of young ones who respect the elders is getting less.
In marriage, there are imperfections . Simply saying, nothing is perfect and we have to live with imperfect world or the imperfection of others. Then , my friend asked me this question " why do we need to live for others ?". Life is already too short and yet, we have to hold our feelings and hurt ourselves to maintain a marriage. Isn't that not worth it ? Yes and No.
Yes, we can choose to break away and choose the divorce route to live for your ownself and your off springs but you have to make sure your another half or ex-half bears the burden of providing for your off-springs . So, you have to make plan and strategies to get hold of such provision before the feelings gets to the triggering point. Otherwise, life would hard on you to bear all these expenses.
No. You have to understand the imperfections in this world and how you shall manage the imperfections. But again, it depends on the type of imperfections. If it is a cheating or a flaw character case or adultery , then it is not worth to save the marriage, if it hurts you too deeply or have breach your trust. All of us have moments of weakness and in love, there must be a lot of understandings. If we choose divorce for every small weakness, then we will be like a hippie and it is better not to get married.
The question to me is that should she divorce her husband? I do not know all the facts and it is very difficult for me to advise her . But, whether she divorse him or not is not the matter, I suggest to took the correct steps to get the financial details of her better half or lower half and get the security when the time comes or whether it comes or not , it does matter.
Currently, there was a long running chase in Sarawak , where a billionaire son is fighting to defend his right to the billion in his account in a divorce case. When the relationship gets sour, it will be too late and difficult for either party to claim provision for financial support of their children especially the man or the women is successful and smart. It applies in both ways.
My point is based on my experience and knowledge. When the milk is sour, why we need to keep it ? It only hurts both parties and if it goes beyond the point of displeasure where the sight of each other is upsetting and hurting , it is time to go rather than keep hurting each other.
Namaste.
Friday, February 7, 2014
Thursday, February 6, 2014
My rebellous daughter M
I have told my daughter that my love for her is unconditional even if she makes mistakes in life and as long as she realized it was wrong. From young, I have been pampering her with my time and also wealth.
When she was young, we took her to all the buffet lunch and dinners around town and she enjoyed most the major and well known hotel's food and facilities. She grew from a skinny little girl to a tall and plum girl. She was lax at school and we just take it at her stripe but she managed to pass her college diploma exams with butterfly, cats and dogs gradings.
Once, I noticed that her character also change to be very independent, rebellous and stubborn. I do not know what is going through her mind and why she has been behaving this way. If I pushed too hard, she will just withdraw into a shell and say nothing.
My offer of love and money can only get her to say thank you each time but she remained aloof and unaccessible.
Recently, she broke up with her boy friend for two years and I asked her why because I could see that her boyfriend have been very caring for her. Her answer is that she need someone to love her the way she wants him to love her and not just someone been obidient and behave like a good dog. Yes, I kind of know what she mean but there is no such perfect partner who will know all her needs. I doubted she will ever find one. Well, this maybe part of her process of growing up and her own protective mechanism.
Once, a friend told me that she will only grow at her own pace and sometimes, they refuse to use their thinking capacity. Until then, they will live like a free loader and have a layback thinking. Hopefully, there will be a time in her life where she realized that she needs to invoke her thinking capacity. Like the saying goes " There is a time for everything . When it happen, it will happen and when it does not happen , then it mend to be this way ".
To her , I have my best wishes and hopefully, she knows what she is doing and where is she is going.
My love for her is still unconditioned.
Namaste.
When she was young, we took her to all the buffet lunch and dinners around town and she enjoyed most the major and well known hotel's food and facilities. She grew from a skinny little girl to a tall and plum girl. She was lax at school and we just take it at her stripe but she managed to pass her college diploma exams with butterfly, cats and dogs gradings.
Once, I noticed that her character also change to be very independent, rebellous and stubborn. I do not know what is going through her mind and why she has been behaving this way. If I pushed too hard, she will just withdraw into a shell and say nothing.
My offer of love and money can only get her to say thank you each time but she remained aloof and unaccessible.
Recently, she broke up with her boy friend for two years and I asked her why because I could see that her boyfriend have been very caring for her. Her answer is that she need someone to love her the way she wants him to love her and not just someone been obidient and behave like a good dog. Yes, I kind of know what she mean but there is no such perfect partner who will know all her needs. I doubted she will ever find one. Well, this maybe part of her process of growing up and her own protective mechanism.
Once, a friend told me that she will only grow at her own pace and sometimes, they refuse to use their thinking capacity. Until then, they will live like a free loader and have a layback thinking. Hopefully, there will be a time in her life where she realized that she needs to invoke her thinking capacity. Like the saying goes " There is a time for everything . When it happen, it will happen and when it does not happen , then it mend to be this way ".
To her , I have my best wishes and hopefully, she knows what she is doing and where is she is going.
My love for her is still unconditioned.
Namaste.
Tuesday, February 4, 2014
30 best fat-burning foods
30 best fat-burning foods
Food enlightenment for all who wants to reduce their fats. Click the link :
Namaste.
Food enlightenment for all who wants to reduce their fats. Click the link :
Namaste.
Hypocrite face
There is a saying " we should appreciate people talking to us frankly into our face but to be cautious of those talking badly behind us". These are people is sheep skin or wolves in human forms. These people are called hypocrites.
How can we identify these people ? Hypocrites will show their true colors in time of difficulties or will abandon you in the first sight of trouble. They will fly off like birds in the forest at the smell of trouble. There is also a saying ' it is difficult to share wealth and it is more difficult to share sufferings'. True friendship is very difficult to find.
The Holy Dalai Lama have this wisdom to share " if you cannot help others , don't harm them". For hypocrites, they will paint a very good picture for you to venture and in times of trouble, they will leave you to face the trouble yourself". So, there is harm to others. This phase means not to advise or lead others into trouble as this means that you bring harm to others.
Smiling faces, poker faces and nice looking faces are only fronts to hide a cheating and evil heart and such evilness will only come out in time when their safety or comfort is threaten. In short, when you are hanging by a thread , they will not lift a hand to pull you up because they could also fell with you.
So , beware , beware and beware of others who come to see you in time of fortune and greeting you with the sweetest of the sweet words and run away when they saw the first sight of a bad moon.
Idiots, idiots, idiots...
Namaste.
How can we identify these people ? Hypocrites will show their true colors in time of difficulties or will abandon you in the first sight of trouble. They will fly off like birds in the forest at the smell of trouble. There is also a saying ' it is difficult to share wealth and it is more difficult to share sufferings'. True friendship is very difficult to find.
The Holy Dalai Lama have this wisdom to share " if you cannot help others , don't harm them". For hypocrites, they will paint a very good picture for you to venture and in times of trouble, they will leave you to face the trouble yourself". So, there is harm to others. This phase means not to advise or lead others into trouble as this means that you bring harm to others.
Smiling faces, poker faces and nice looking faces are only fronts to hide a cheating and evil heart and such evilness will only come out in time when their safety or comfort is threaten. In short, when you are hanging by a thread , they will not lift a hand to pull you up because they could also fell with you.
So , beware , beware and beware of others who come to see you in time of fortune and greeting you with the sweetest of the sweet words and run away when they saw the first sight of a bad moon.
Idiots, idiots, idiots...
Namaste.
Monday, February 3, 2014
My hippie daughter, M
My hippie daughter, M
During the sixties, there was a period which belongs to the hippie years which a trend for free love, drugs like maurujuana and freedom calls and song promoting free love. I was at my teens and I could see these girls with flowers on their head dancing and traveling around and fighting for their human rights and freedom. Another word for the hippies is the "flower girls".
Life was easy for them, no need.jobs , layback and lazy and wondering around with groups of hippies aimlessly. There is no purpose and aim in their life. They are born to be free and feed on alms and just live to die.
This period , was the years of the confused mind. No responsibilities for themselves and others . Liberated in an unliberated world. They want to change the world but the world finally changed them and their period just die off.
They may not be entirely wrong but they have gone to the extreme and become unbalance. They have too much leisure and freedom and they thought that life is live to die. Not to live to ripe old age but die a natural death in whatever manner. Live and let live in whichever way you want and die whatever way you want. So carefree.
Another extreme is to work for our money and wealth and to responsible for our children. Sacrifice for our children and neglect ourself to be totally for the welfare of our children. Life is to live for others. This another misguided concept of life.
Life is to balance and live in moderation . Practice the middle path which is the balance way. If we live the extremes , we will suffer great sadness and great happiness . The point is from one extreme to the next extreme. There is little variation if we choose the middle path. Forever constant. We are in control rather living in a wild swing.
My daughter M is not thing and have not got this great awareness as yet. There is not the time for her to think but to be trap I her hippy ways. Hopefully, there is a time for her.
Namaste1
During the sixties, there was a period which belongs to the hippie years which a trend for free love, drugs like maurujuana and freedom calls and song promoting free love. I was at my teens and I could see these girls with flowers on their head dancing and traveling around and fighting for their human rights and freedom. Another word for the hippies is the "flower girls".
Life was easy for them, no need.jobs , layback and lazy and wondering around with groups of hippies aimlessly. There is no purpose and aim in their life. They are born to be free and feed on alms and just live to die.
This period , was the years of the confused mind. No responsibilities for themselves and others . Liberated in an unliberated world. They want to change the world but the world finally changed them and their period just die off.
They may not be entirely wrong but they have gone to the extreme and become unbalance. They have too much leisure and freedom and they thought that life is live to die. Not to live to ripe old age but die a natural death in whatever manner. Live and let live in whichever way you want and die whatever way you want. So carefree.
Another extreme is to work for our money and wealth and to responsible for our children. Sacrifice for our children and neglect ourself to be totally for the welfare of our children. Life is to live for others. This another misguided concept of life.
Life is to balance and live in moderation . Practice the middle path which is the balance way. If we live the extremes , we will suffer great sadness and great happiness . The point is from one extreme to the next extreme. There is little variation if we choose the middle path. Forever constant. We are in control rather living in a wild swing.
My daughter M is not thing and have not got this great awareness as yet. There is not the time for her to think but to be trap I her hippy ways. Hopefully, there is a time for her.
Namaste1
Sunday, February 2, 2014
A quiet moment - today
A quiet moment - today
I have been very hectic the past few days. Having to closed the year with some serious decisions before the year of the horse gallop in and I have travelled to KL on the 1st day of new year and back to Penang today. The long hours of traveling today make me erg sleepy in the afternoon and I took a power nap before taking my dinner.
The travel from Penang to KL was smooth and blissful . It was so smooth with any jam while the cars from from KL to Penang was jammed packed.the return trip from KL to Penang was the same as the trip from Penang to KL. Blissful and smooth. So, relaxing but again, t was jammed from Penang to KL. Traveling in KL by car was smooth as the the traffic in most roads were thin and easy. I think this trend I the traffics happens in most public holidays. If you have a good car, it should be an enjoying ride in these directions which I have taken.
Now , I have a quiet moment to reflect on the happenings in the past few days. I had several rounds of good food, meet many relatives and friends, have a round of yoga exercise with my sister in law in her fitness center and moving around the malls and shopping complex , a round latte and good conversations. All these activities were enjoyable including losing a couple of hundred ringgits in a social card game. It was like giving Ang pau to my nieces. Beautiful nieces.
Now, I have take a good rest to face tomorrow , the first working day in the year of the horse. Stay active fellas and enjoy every minutes.
Namaste.
I have been very hectic the past few days. Having to closed the year with some serious decisions before the year of the horse gallop in and I have travelled to KL on the 1st day of new year and back to Penang today. The long hours of traveling today make me erg sleepy in the afternoon and I took a power nap before taking my dinner.
The travel from Penang to KL was smooth and blissful . It was so smooth with any jam while the cars from from KL to Penang was jammed packed.the return trip from KL to Penang was the same as the trip from Penang to KL. Blissful and smooth. So, relaxing but again, t was jammed from Penang to KL. Traveling in KL by car was smooth as the the traffic in most roads were thin and easy. I think this trend I the traffics happens in most public holidays. If you have a good car, it should be an enjoying ride in these directions which I have taken.
Now , I have a quiet moment to reflect on the happenings in the past few days. I had several rounds of good food, meet many relatives and friends, have a round of yoga exercise with my sister in law in her fitness center and moving around the malls and shopping complex , a round latte and good conversations. All these activities were enjoyable including losing a couple of hundred ringgits in a social card game. It was like giving Ang pau to my nieces. Beautiful nieces.
Now, I have take a good rest to face tomorrow , the first working day in the year of the horse. Stay active fellas and enjoy every minutes.
Namaste.
Saturday, February 1, 2014
My new year resolutions - horse year
My year of the horse 2014
I am from the year of the snake and according to the. Horoscope . I will have a busy year and I must take care of my health and needs to balance work with enough rest. For other things , there nothing exciting and opportunity for wealth is good，I do not know what will hold for the future but will keep these forecast in mind.
Last year , several predictions were right and I was given more responsibility and have a very busy working year. I have trained up several young people around me and help me to achieve all the task give to me so far. I have to keep them near me and give them more responsibility and exposure.
Life is fragile and uncertain . I have to live every minutes joyfully and meaningfully as I am aware that time is very precious and getting less I aged. I also know that it is within my will and decision to decide what to do with rest of it. I have to remain useful and active and not to opt for an idle , layback and wasteful life. I should concentrate to train the young and impart my wisdom to them and guide them to a brighter future.
All these ideals are my new year resolutions and I should pursue them wisely and vigorously and to make sure it is all implemented sincerely.
To my readers , I will impart more on my valuable experience and encounters in my life to all of you.
Namaste.
I am from the year of the snake and according to the. Horoscope . I will have a busy year and I must take care of my health and needs to balance work with enough rest. For other things , there nothing exciting and opportunity for wealth is good，I do not know what will hold for the future but will keep these forecast in mind.
Last year , several predictions were right and I was given more responsibility and have a very busy working year. I have trained up several young people around me and help me to achieve all the task give to me so far. I have to keep them near me and give them more responsibility and exposure.
Life is fragile and uncertain . I have to live every minutes joyfully and meaningfully as I am aware that time is very precious and getting less I aged. I also know that it is within my will and decision to decide what to do with rest of it. I have to remain useful and active and not to opt for an idle , layback and wasteful life. I should concentrate to train the young and impart my wisdom to them and guide them to a brighter future.
All these ideals are my new year resolutions and I should pursue them wisely and vigorously and to make sure it is all implemented sincerely.
To my readers , I will impart more on my valuable experience and encounters in my life to all of you.
Namaste.
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